101

i'm getting old

i sleep more often watching movies, something i'd never thought would happen to me, especially when i use to wonder how my dad would just fall asleep at the most interesting parts of an action movie.

same shit is happening to me, maybe it's the overdose of CG or my ability to endure bad storytelling.


a lot of people would say, well you're not even 30, you're still young, and obviously it comes from those who are 40 and above, it's amazing how they wake up everyday, i guess i'll only understand when i get that ancient.

but the only real thing that bothers me about aging, is the inevitable end of it all.

i've seen people who have passed away gracefully and those who weren't prepared.

how will i be in the end? i never had a problem with the concept of death whether it comes now or later, but if i do reach some phenomenal expiry date and, when i'm lying with my last breath.

will i then finally be afraid, the fear a result of never acting on your desires, and ultimate regret.

i best prepare to live a life that i can be satisfied with before i leave this world.

only ones own expectations count.

number 100

the barrier

or barriers

there seems to be too many these days

and still none of them seem to be overcome


the spider's web continues to grow as fast as we do sometimes

it's almost futile to keep trying to break through alone

we must get some help or be eaten up like the rest of the other flies.

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