Thursday, July 26, 2007

Ok Comuter 2

Back to cross the road to the bus-stop, in a distance i can see the 159, my lucky day

as the bus gets closer it turns to the 109, the mind has tricked again, we want to see only what we want to see.

when my bus finally arrives, i wait to get on after the disable-dude does, i see him all the time and also the same girl that wears black slacks to work, i bet she works at starbucks or something.

i stand again waiting for all the bastards students to get off.....nope thats another story

this time it rained like shit, so i tried to call a cab, no hope in hell

whats the point of having so many cabs, but if it rains there isnt enough, dats why ppl need cars! we're in the equator, it rains all the freakin time! how come singaporeans never figured this out?

the only good thing about not getting a cab is, the bus is pretty damn empty, its like a horror movie.

but the trip is short enough, and i reach my destination only to notice that it still is freakin raining like hell.

so i had to figure how to cross the road without getting to an aircond office all wet n shit. i obviously didnt bring any umbrellas or raincoats.

option 1 : i could get into the shade of the bus stop, hail a cab, pay $2.50 just to make a single u-turn

option 2: run like a monkey in heat

option 3: i couldnt think fast enough, so i waved goodbye to my colleague who did bring an umbrella, and left my stop without getting of the bus.

like rosa parks, i sat my ass down, because im not gonna get wet just for getting to work in time!

hell no!

so i traveled where the 159 took me, untill things would clear up and then I'd hail a cab and pay more than i would if i took one earlier at my office stop, but at least the flag fall of 2.50 wouldnt have been a waste.

i crossed highways and byways before the rain finally cleared up, in the heart of Toa Payoh.

all that were left on the bus, where a bunch of old geezers, i was hoping to get off somewhere near a mall or something, maybe i couldve made my trip useful.

so i took my cue from the geriatrics, and got off when most of them got off.

It was weird, almost like in the twilight zone, all this old people coming from everywhere, not just the bus i got off from, but from every nook and cranny all heading towards one building,

i just had to see what was going on, as i got closer, the sign read

"chinese medicinal association" or something like that, my memory sux.

i just stop in my tracks, and told myself to get the hell back to work,

but then i thought, why the hell did i come all this way for? i at least needed to get some tea,
so i head to a coffee shop, and sat myself with the rest of the old geezers that had nothing better to do in life but DIE!

i had my 1.20 teh ping, damn isnt it expensive over here? im never gonna bitch about KL again.

i wondered about life, i was listening to Tiesto on my mp3player, and nothing seemed to fit at all,

so it just meant: get the hell back to work.

I get my ass movin, i hail a cab, i arrive back at work, i pay like $7.00 something something

and realised i should have just paid the flagfall of 2.50 to make a u-turn

or i should have taken a cab from my apartment

BUT DAMN IT ! I COULDNT CALL FOR ONE!

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

rebel allianced

its midnight, i have work tomorrow

im so not in the mood to blog.......i just have to blog


why must this be?

its like i so dont want to smoke ever, i just need a cigarette

drinking is bad for my liver, but i really need some liqour

im not saving enough, i just have to buy extravagantly

i so want to love, i just have to hate


im like a teenage vampire, so hungry and rebellious, im sticking it to myself

i go against every truthful thought i can think of

is this some mild form of schizophrenia, or does everyone live in two minds.

so tricky i reverse things just to go forward

i feel so lazy i just have to run

its not my responsibility i just take the rap

my heart aches, i just keep occupied

im tired like shit, i can laugh for hours

..................when u try ur best but you dont succeed
when u get what u want
but not what u need
...........i really gotta fix myself, or so ive keep tellin myself for the last 8 years

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

back in the saddle

Back on the plate,


seemed like yesterday, as comfortable as it gets

will i start choking like owen, or will i Van and deliver.

it doesnt matter, it only means the ignorance is lost, in fact it was lost a long time ago.

Just nobody wants the dehydrating reality that makes some people put a bullet in their head.

we keep spiraling in the same pitfalls, always procrastinating the solution.

it's inevitable, it's only human.

it's me as it's you

we all just need somebody to lean on.........(church choir hums)

so just call on me brother, if u need a hand

dum dum da dum dum da dum dum

Saturday, June 30, 2007

more than meets the eye

so straight after work, i and me colleague caught a cab down to orchard

the place is crowded with the youth of the republic, all lookin cool and shit, but i doubt many could get their hands on any drugs

we await another party to hav some dinner, but walkin round the place so long smellin all the scrumptious aromas,

we decided fuck it lets eat, we cheap fellas so we head to the food court, we get a table for 6, he just leaves his bag on the chair and he says "lets go order"

and i says, "nevermind i'll watch the place"

and he says "dont worry my bags here"

and i says, "you just gonna leave it here?"

and he says, "its ok, its singapore"

and i whisper to him "dont ever do that in KL"

so i go look for some food, all packed as usual, seeing the density of the republic is like antz at a sugarbowl.

i go for something fast, not chicken rice coz ive been eatin it a million times, tried some sour spicy noodles, which looks very china the china.

not too bad, not enough, so i ended up with chicken rice anyway also.

the rest arrive, we finish our meals and we head on the screens.

we got delayed 15 minutes, according to the cinema they did not expect extra footage to be added, but we all knew those motherfuckers probably dont know how to read time.

we get in, its a digital projecter n shit, doesnt look sharper to me, but the colours look good,

suprisingly not too many adverts, GM probably bought up the space, it starts

its funny, it has a decent storyline, its super nostalgic, the effects are smooth, the babe is hot i enjoyed for the rest of the 143 minutes.

Sunday, June 10, 2007

staring at bucks

in the enclosure of coffee-chess tables, light folky tunes and industrial air conditioning


staring at the heat on the outside, too bright to register as a colour, cars hoping along like salmon at berth


i recall wathcing priceless recently, very classic storytelling, with classy acting, i love audrey tatou although my boss finds her face irritating,

he might have a point, but her acting makes me see past that, that makes me dig her even more.....


today is kinda golden like the cote d zur in the movies, or maybe its just my imagination, the last few days were more like jakarta at rush hour.


im off to suck some green tea powder blended with tap-water-ice-cubes

it never stops

Thursday, June 07, 2007

if time permits

soon i wouldve travelled all the stadiums of the land

some nice, some old, some dying

when will people start gathering together instead of sitting infront of a tv dreaming of the ideal

when will people start using their imagination rather than overstimuli of digital digestion

when will we walk instead of raping the earth to sit on our arses

when was before, now its over



i guess we gotta look on the little bright side of life dats left

*whistle*

Sunday, May 20, 2007

ok comuter

its back to school, i wake up on time everyday to catch the bus to work

i practically live in an air-cond environment, most of the time at work and back at the service apartment i live in.

so getting out of the house is like coming back from australia, the humidity gets to you, and it's only the bloody morning, when the suns not even at its prime.

i get the daily paper so i dun get bored waiting for the bus to come, one of those big spreads, 80 sing cents for so little articles, but it beats staring at the other horde of people wishing they hadnt woken up so early.

Then at a distance, this orangy-white block on wheels is waiting at the traffic lights just before my stop, im waiting for the 159 but i cant make out the three digits just yet, but im off my seat to get in line and i've finished the main page of the paper anyway.

I'm finally going to be free from this prison of waiting, but no, its the 109, how deceptive, my sentence is lengthened.

I eventually catch the 159 and cram in like a sardine in a can, waiting for a seat, but not desperate for one, since the leg room were designed for midgets anyway, i'm happy standing holding a cold steel pole looking at the bell af it were a button to send some nuclear missile into space, just feeling trigger happy, but there's probably 45 minutes left to go even though its only like a 10 min car ride.

then on the 20th min of the ride, the bus goes empty because it stops at the univeristy, i have a buffet spread of seats to choose from and i happily sit my ass on two seats, spreading my legs staring outside the window, giving the evil eye to all those freakin students, wishing they OD'd on something.

by this time im done with the paper, and i couldnt be bothered to read the classifieds which turns out to be the biggest section. so i decide to dream about my car, my shitty little car back home.

we've been seing each other for more then five years, we've done so much together, been to millions of places, and yes we've had our share of spoils, countless trips to the mechanics and several bumps and dents and the occasional crash.

my car's getting older, faster then me, like a dog would, i wouldnt trade it for the world, but i'm probably gonna witness its destruction.

ding-dong
my stops here, i get to work

fast-forward to the weekends

if im lucky enough to be done in the city before its too late, i can still catch the last few trains home, its usually packed heading to the suburbs, so i continue my stand, offering my sacrifice to god so that children in poor countries have a better life.

i still have to take another bus back, but this time its late, n theres probably only 3 people who get on with me, the lights are dim, i sit right at the back, dead center, like a counterweight to the 2 ton vehicle.

i get to see all the flats lit up, n yes they still look the same, just like the mornings.

last nite i took the wrong/right bus because i didnt wanna walk 400m to the proper bus stop.

right = because it still stopped at my apartment

wrong= because it was the reverse loop, so i had to see everyone get on and off the bus for half and hour before i got home.

no mp3 player, no newspaper, i just played music and movies in my head........new radicals came to mind..........weird.....u got the music in you..............you know this world will pull through.....dont give up.........u got a reason to live........you only get what you give........

man he sounds like every other preacher out there.

Tuesday, May 15, 2007

how do they do it

copywriters, journalist, authors


great words at their fingertips, does it come easily after thousands and thousands of phrases, cliches, over and over again.

those who write probably have to drown themselves in lots of alcohol or drugs just to find a synonym that works.

whats worse is when you type a piece of crap that other people actually think is witty or funny, but you know u probably copied it from some cheap ass ad in a country u visited some time ago.

how many terminologies can u use up before u actually go terminal?

paraphrase like daylight robbery,

or just block and paste with technology.

when ya were young you thought ya were so damn creative an original

then ya grew up and noticed every original thought u had, was replicated a million times and was probably written by the greeks.

ya wish ya never cared, ya wish ya never needed to depend on that skill.

but ya know in the back of ur mind, ya'd better get whatever small piece of freedom ya can scrap in this freakin closed minded, authoritarian world that we live in.

so yabadabadadoodideedee, better to jargon than to sell out on your desires.

Sunday, May 06, 2007

The golden city

Not often do u see a golden display from the heavens complementing the protruding skyscrapers.

Magic hour, puffy clouds, it's turning orange to red.

An unknown feeling being completely alone, surrounded by many.

Too be silent amongst a frenzy.

Nowhere to hide, to run freely.

Only in the mind u can travel away, to a place, a time that fills you.

If hurt will not change you, if pain is not without you.

You carry on, you morph into what matters, and everyone finds their own center.

Remember the sounds, the warmth, the joy. Thou shall carry with you everywhere.

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

We will not surrender!

dida might have tried his best to keep us out of the game

even evra helped screw things along the way

kaka's the shit like his name describes

but rooney has on his devil eyes


if u have absolutely no defenders left

when mikael silvestre is still wanting a chance

heinze can still kick some butt

we'll survive no matter what


come on maldini, come on gattuso

come back stronger and more willing

let scholesy make you drowsy

and giggs leave you with twisted blood

and if that aint enough, ronnie will surely leave you like a dummy


FOR 90 MINUTES WE'LL LET THEM KNOW...........
............WE'RE MAN UNITED HERE WE GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Pounding Prata

Did the morning shift today, so I'm back in the afternoon,

decided to test my culinary skills by cooking whatever thats going bad in the fridge.

i wont go into details, but i wanted cook some frozen prata i bought recently.

whatever the brand was, the packaging sucked, all the prata stuck together, i had to kinda wait for it to slowly defrost,

getting impatient, i just started to chip away at the sides, getting more frustrated i started stabbing and cutting with a knife,

i lost the plot and smacked whatever remained on a hot pan, pushing it down with my fingers,

it aint doin shit, apart from burning the outer layers, i grab the knife and keep poking at it, flipping it around, pressing it down even more,

i get the chunk outta of the pan, i cut it up (its easier now) to quarters, and rip out whatever that's burnt.

i slapped the quarters back on the pan, and i keep pushing.

i end up with quite an interesting, crispy texture, but i had to peel out alot of the burnt stuff.

but i ended up cooking way to much, and stuffed myself silly, and now im goin thru a flour overdose, and i cant even think straight trying to research on malaysian sports, and im in an aircond room, and all the blood is flowing to my stomach, and i wanna puke,

but hey, lets not make things better by taking some coke

yeah, expand, expand,


......saw first jam in the suburbs, went for first morning shift, took the bus home with a bunch of school kids, watched the cleaners do their work, ER 1st season, CSI new york, coach carter, thaksin wanna buy man city, need to get editing, need more groceries, cant keep cooking shit, wanna watch wild hogs and all other shows, missed out in buying rusian dolls, to shy to do payperview, yabadabadoo.

Monday, March 26, 2007

ive got something to take away the pain

another sunday

another futsal game at the usual 2pm segambut arena, when the sun is at its peak

the zink housing acts like a conventional oven, the spoilt exhaust fans are for decorative purposes and the pace of the game makes us wonder how a world cup in africa is gonna be like.


its usually a group of advertisers and church community friends that meet up and reminiscent our youthful days gone by. trying to be our footballing heroes, trying to be a legend for just one day, or for others, just some good exercise.

as for me, thanks to my torn ACL i usually just end up as a goalie, and quite a half-baked one since i cant hardly react with my feet to low ball situations, i aint gonna jump in and dive to save any ballz, and every player knows my weakness. But nobody wants to play there anyway unless their shit tired, and i pay my share of RM12 everytime, so nobody complains.


the best part of being a goalie is you dont have to run so much, just a lot of standing and reacting, and you hardly have to bother about hard tackles, just hard shots, and man, some of these old fellas can shoot, age doesnt seem to reduce the power of their follow throughs.

In short, risks of injuries are lower...............or so i thought.

I get tons of head decapitating shots all the time, but there was this softer curled shot to my lower left, i seemed to have jammed my index finger onto it.

Like an evian bottle being crushed for recycling, there went my finger, compressed and popped right back out.

If hands had brains, my lefty is a total retard, it gets injured all the time, it just doesnt know how to caress a ball like my right, like a virgin to a whorehouse it keeps ramming into those shots, i might as well use my cock to stop the balls.

at the end of the day im glad i still managed to stop the shot, preventing a goal, excusing myself from the game on a higher note as compared to the time i fractured my hand in school.

again i was in goal, playing with my marching band buddies in the free school quadrangle, using the gymnast ring poles as a goal post.
all of us playing on a slightly muddy heavily unlevel grass field in our whites and school shoes.

on came the slowest of backpasses, i steadied myself to launch it back in the air,

i slipped slightly, i missed the ball completely, there was a goal, and i came crashing on my hand

i heard that internal sound nobody else could hear : "crack" , and the rest was history.



now sitting back here, trying to type without my left-index, all those f*ing F's i have to type with my middle finger (how appropriate) i realised what damon wayon's was trying to do in Major Payne when he broke a soldiers finger to make him forget about the injuries he was having.

all these injuries, sickness, it brings you back a step, makes you think clearer of what you've done and how brittle we all are.

all that shit form the songs how scars remind us how the past is real

it really helps us to FEEL i guess.


ffffffffffffffin ffffffin fffffffin fffffffin Fs

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

the last dayz

its been raining heavily for the last two nights, and im glad for having those cool-thunderstormed-sleeps

woke up several times today, apart from taking a piss or just opening my eyes, i just kept being locked down to the bed, some force of gravity keeping me there, did not feel too tired, so i just kept my eyes closed for the sake of it.

its a wonderful feeling having to struggle on how late you want to wake up, i waited for the sun but then it was still cold, so i decided to wait for the early afternoon warm to creep in before i decided to get my day going, which is probably gonna be filled with having meals banking a small cheque and watching tele

in this big-bad-city, the pace can really get to you, everything is money, you cant even have free entertainment, and in turn time is the money, so having all this time to waste kinda makes me feel like a freakin millionaire

the highlight of it all would probably be still stuck in the bed at some god-forsaken hour when your girlfriend has to get up to the grind of things and make it to work on time.
you hear the showers, the making up, yet you cant open ur eyes because the fluorescent lights might blind you seeing that the sun aint up yet.
and just after the scent of perfume is being sprayed, you get the gentlest goodbye kiss, a very unique and comforting kiss, seing that the person is willing to give a part of their busy schedule to show some affection to someone who is still laid flat on the bed, mouth as open as fly trap and probably with drool slipping through the side lips.
still to0 flat out to return the affection, you know silently that a new day begins.

and it ends pretty well too, when you're out lepaking at some mall just looking at human behaviour and decided to head back before rush hour, the traffic is as smooth as silk and the sun starts to tilt, and the colours come out gold and you know theres is still hope in this city, this country, as faded out as it seems most of the time, the sunset and swaying trees from the occasional breeze reminds us of a golden past and hopefully a future.

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

myron recommends

ive been watchin a lot of movies during my unemployment, and with a less stressed-out mind i can be more objective in what i watch,

so heres some must sees:-

1. tenacious D and the pick of destiny

one of the most important movies ever made, musical, funny, plain good old motherfuckin fun


2. the pursuit of happyness

the film dat made me get a job, the whole freakin show is about the struggle of unemployment. i mean if will smith can go through all dat shit and still come out punchin and crying, hell so can i.

3. 300

theres nothing better than seeing body parts being sliced up/stabbed or ripped to pieces, all the blood, all the stylistic treatment, all the scottish accents

4. factory girl

if u never fancied sienna miller, you;ll love her here, playing Edie Sedgwick some famous icon in the 60s and Andy Warhols closest muse. Good hippie fun with all the sex and drugs and freedom. Guy Pearce was pretty cool doing warhol too, but who wouldnt be?

5. Pan's labyrinth

to be honest i havent seen it yet, but hell everybody seems to want to watch it! and i've purchased the damn dvd.


6. Liverpool vs. Man United 06/07

the most important tale of destiny. where a winning team can play absolute rubbish football and still come out on tops because fate dictates so. see how an irish player who doesnt know whether he's a fullback, holding midfielder or a cantona, score a goal at the end of the rainbow. and the most important moral of all, if you're a scouser, you're doomed to disappointment if you aint lived in the 70s.

Wednesday, March 07, 2007

Nana nat, nana nat.

ive done it, got a job finally, my life isnt doomed after all!

im gonna be an assitant producer for a sports tv company setting up shop in Malaysia.

alot has happened since my last post, but its probably full of anxiety and depression.

so stay posted for more positive news!

Sunday, January 21, 2007

Another dark stormy evening

its about the only time i feel like blogging, when the weather is dark and mysterious...

but it was no mystery to me that Liverpool couldve beaten chelsea, i even picked out the scorer, mr. kuyt himself.

ive never been so proud of liverpool, the enemy of my enemy, who is still my enemy nevertheless


tonite, MU vs Arsenal, it'll be tight as hell, on a realistic level, they are equally strengthed, so the logical outcome would be a draw........but being a MU fan, im pretty sure the gunners are gonna be humiliated at home, and rooney will finally break his goal drought.


i hope i have a good year as MU is having, 2007 to be a blast, has to be, or my mid-twenties is really gonna suck

Saturday, January 13, 2007

Its a dark and stormy evening

I'm at the office, on a sat evening, checking out my edits or my editors edits, seeing that im not so proacative in editing nowadays, just learning to depend on other people to get the job done.


didnt bring my laptop to work, so im on the only office computer that aint a non-linear editing system, surfing the net, waiting for my editor to come back from McDonalds, he's buying me a coke, just what i need to get thru the day.

this is apparently my first post of 2007 after a few weeks exiled in the hours of reality TV production. it might just be my last post in the company Homegrown and with Mike, my employer for the last 3 years.

ive paid my dues in reality TV and finally now i have the ballz and loss of patience to look elsewhere. I want to get in a news network like Al-Jazeera or a sports network like ESPN and really give my all. i really need to find a way in.

i'll sweep the floors if i have to, my instinct tells me so, and thats the one thing ive been denying for a long time, and it always bites me in the arse.

but like all things you love, it always hurts to let go, i dont have children so i wouldnt know what that feels like, but leaving a company i like working in as compared to normal people who leave when they hate their jobs, leaves a painful scar.

i dunno when i'll get over it, in fact i havent even left yet, but my life is about big decisions, and everything i do revolves around decision making.

I've made up my mind, im not turning back, im forced to believe in myself.

Saturday, December 02, 2006

phew

yeah, i've got a day of a week!

a day! not even the weekend! just the sabbath!

thats how things are going rite now, just work like crazy and enjoy the smaller pleasure in life


like lying on my torn up couch, using my laptop wireless, wathcing house on tele even though arsenal vs tottenham is on, who cares really?

just interviewed siti for the first time at work, just one question, she had all the answers printed, i couldnt even hear her speak coz i wasnt monitoring with headphones, but i just said , "good, thats great!" i guess i'll only find out when i edit.


MU loans henrik larsson, betweeen him and ole there is now 70 years worth of experience.


my girlfriend is with her girlfriend in johor, miss her dearly even though we see each other all the time, but i guess when you're free and alone, life's a bore. plus when she gets back, we both will be all busy again. but i guess there will always be some time in the future

when i loose it and shout off in the office "who's comin with me!"


life is weird, there is so little free time, i had to shoot at 7am, i woke at 5.30 am, too early just incase i couldnt wake up, still had time

had enough time to cook myself some breakfast!

ooh, house is getting interesting

out

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

End of 06

its gonna be december soon

another year gone by like the wind and thankfully the haze


there was the world cup, one in a million which wasted most of my year, and now im close to being flat broke coz i cant seem to figure out how to save


will next year be better?

if MU wins back the league and maybe the champions league, it'd be splendid

if i get a pay increment and a nice bonus

if my parents get more comfortable financially

if i get it together on the work, health, home front


compare myself to back in the dayz, i feel im a much improved product, but it just aint cutting it in the adult world.

next year will be interesting, intead of fighting all the time for what i need/want

i'd really have to guide others to meet their goals, and i cant possibly do that if im a wreck

so i guess i have no choice, every year goes by and more and more people depend on me

i dont have a choice, but im not regretting either

too many other ppl with shittier problems


its a time for trust, its a time for understanding, its maturing time

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

The Face of Cambodia 4


told u they had worse ways of packing things up.....and actually there are worse! didnt take a picture

these are the famous landmines they've been talkin about, u might not loose ur legs, but more of ur sense of smell

these are the mine sweepers, yes they start off really young

if they dont succeed as mine sweepers, they can always go into the culinary arts and serve up the various forms of khmer food. this particular chap had the best noodle soup fish ball thingy ive tasted in the whole country

this is practically how the whole country looks like, i hope to be back in the future where i can catch a train and go to some high tech disco


the end

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

The Face of Cambodia 3


this is the view from the guesthouse, somewhere along there are clinics where children are sleeping on wooden beds hooked up to IV's, if u enlarge the pic u might see something.


tis is the school that the malaysians are building, soon it will have 4 classrooms! thats why they need a couple hundred more to cater for the rest of the nation

tis the children that live in the surrounding neighbourhood, thats the average size for their houses, although there are smaller ones nearer to the rivers in siem reap

tis is our cameraman jeremy trying to get his national geographic portfolio of poor people

the two in the middle are building the school, the extreme right is the headmaster who is about my age and the rest are students forced to wear their uniform during the holidays because they might end up on tv....might.

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

The Face Cambodia 2


this is one of the two main highways, of the whole country. good old fashioned two laned, and u can stack as may ppl as u can on any vehicle, be it 5 to a motorcycle or like this one here, and this one aint even the worse example


there are one or two rest stops when u near a small town, and thats not often. they sell all sorts of goodies like this deep fried spider and small frogs which u tend to kill on the highway at night anyway. for those insect eating lovers, u know this some good shit

this is Snoul, i feel like i'm in the wild wild west, only humid. this a good place to stay if you want to feel like ur in some chinese period set

this the place when its more bustling. dun worry, they might look fierce but none of us were hurt. we only witness some couple fighting in the night in thai, the guy must have slept with someone else


and this is what we could eat at night, when we arrived. rice, tea, fish soup, deer meat (only bones were left) and some cheap giant durians.

Sunday, October 29, 2006

The Face of Cambodia 1

this is the face of cambodia, let me take u into the wonders of the land, lets start with the beer, it's Angkor, it's lite, it beats water


this is the imperial palace (i think), where the controlling forces have a nice view of the river and everything is clean and dandy, u even see alot of white ppl around, making u feel all the more safer.

this is their central park, where if you're a giant u can just look down and tell the time, again its quite beautifully landscaped, there is lush greens, sand blasted statues and of course......


......homeless locals who dont bother as much to run around or play frisbee, they rather get some shut eye since thinking about life is too painful.


and if the pain is overbearing, u can always get ur local stash of happy stuff on the street or restaurants that are inspired by amsterdam

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

The Van Diaries Day 4/5/6

we get some breakfast nearby the guesthouse


soupy noodles again for me, as the rest had fried rice

pretty good overall

and of course i had to have my coffee

the group continued to discussed about life, politics and stuff while occasionally watching Shoalin soccer on the tele

dubbed in cambodian

and whenever they dub it, u can only hear the dialog, u cant hear the sound effects, music, whatever


but its still entertaining


so off to the famous angkor wat

this baby was huge, i wont waste time explaining how this thing looks like, u better read it off the net.

as we passed thru the first gate, it was nice and cloudy, so we decided to quickly get to the main area, but just as we touched the stone road it started to scorch, as in we needed to repent for something before we entered the sacred temple.

overall, its a damn peaceful and quite place, a fantastic place to reflect on life, the use of light in the architecture is the main star. every corridor, walkway was beautifully lit by the sun thanks to numerous windows.

tons of buddha heads and murals were stolen or destroyed, there is nothing much left except the intricate carvings on the wall.

all the stones are fine after years of aging, it reminds you how time flies yet great things live on.

to reach the top we had to climb some steep steps, pretty dangerous seeing that there aint even any paramedics on standby. we were told that there was an easier way up via railings, but we couldnt find it.

so only after we made the trip back down did we see a long line of old ppl on the right way up.

still alive, so it was a good experience.


after that we headed of to Angkor Thom, the one you see on tomb raider and shit, this was a much more interesting and older temple, seeing how the roots of these giant trees have become part of the structure, transforming it.


then rushed to another temple up the hill to get a full view of the place, again more steep, slipery terrain, but it was kinda worth it, if the skies were clear that is.

we wanted to get like a good sunset shot, but it was just too overcast, so we just watched the loads of japanese tourist taking photos and looking at the wrong direction of the sun, since there was a reflection that is.

the rest of the day and the next is kinda of a blur to me already, i dun really know which took place when.


i know i had a cambodian haircut for like 2USD, if ur local u can get it for RM2, my boss told me to be careful because AIDS was rampant, and u never know how clean these guys are with their razors.......but the barber i went to was a friend of our guide Mendy, and his shop is easily ten times more cleaner than the indian barber i usually end up in.


checked out the bangsar area of siam reap, pretty decent but was too tired to drink and party.

checked out the local markets, bought the usual stuff ppl usually buy in thailand.


the highlight of the journey would be the fishing village off siam reap, dunno what is called but it was next to the tallest hill ive seen in cambodia thus far.

the whole time we were working, surrounded by poverty, we didnt let it affect us, but now when we have nothing to shoot, the pain sets in.

houses just off the river by a foot, the size of my room with a whole family living in it.

women and children bathing themselves on the main road where a few water pumps lay.

cook, shit, play in the same areas.

hard faces, happy faces, this is not the best places to be living in the world.

as shitty as malaysia is, we worry on the trivial, these guys are just glad they arent starving,

we eat like pigs.



as we travelled back to phnom penh in the morning, another 7 hour bumpy ride staright to the airport.

i know someday i'll be back, and i hope things are better seeing that at one time cambodia was the model city of south east asia, a place where singapore came to learn how to build a city, but it all went up in smoke thanks to the continual disregard of the poor.


everybody deserves a basic standard of living,

we must not turn our back on those who need it the most.

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

The Van Diaries Day 3

wake up, get a cold cold shower on tiles stained by the laterite, still quite clen though, just coloured


off to our real work, before that breakfast

some chinese-like noodle beef soup thingy with livers and such

the noodles were like pan mee only green, and it sweetened the soup

not too bad at all.......had more coffee of course


took a stroll around Snoul, shooting some cutaways. there was a street market that we never bothered even stepping into

lotsa motorbike taxis, small horse carts carying rocks and other construction material

a huge anchor beer billboard, and the locals pronounce it as "angkor" making it clear why it has a strong foothold in these parts

see a huge satelite dish, probably where all the cable is coming from,


and lotsa lotsa red dirt and mud, lots of it.


so after breakie we head to the village of ksem krao, luckily only 20 minutes from snoul, so our arses didnt have to hurt on the road.

as you'd expect,more flat land, animals, and wooden houses

we reached the school site, its almost 70% done structurally, a band of kids in uniform (the first ones ive seen) all hanging around to be on camera, seeing that it was still school holidays.

got a tour from the headmaster who looks like my age, there was about 4 classrooms which will be solar powered, and there will be internet via the motorman system

THE MOTORMAN SYSTEM
-cambodian kids start a search on an engine and save it onto a disk
-a man on a motorbike comes and collect these disks and brings it back to the towns with internet, preparing 10 different possible searches
-the man rides back to the village to update the schools computers
-pretty neat for emails and porn but not to good for MSN


they have toilets, a field for planting vegetables so they can have recess fresh from the farm.

and of course a modern day well pump. its a really nice looking thing, all new and clean, u can push the handle with ur smallest pinky and water from the nearby swamps will come pumping through

but the malaysian donors decided to drink the swamp water on camera to prove that it was clean....even to the shock of our local guide.......he must think malaysians are one crazy bunch


after the interviews we decided to head back to snoul interview the district education officer and work was virtually over, with another 3 days left.

so what else is there to do in cambodia?

the angkor wat of course! not a bad idea, i thought i wouldnt be able to see this architectural beauty, but since its only another 7 hours away and they wanted to leave like straight away, and our arses would hurt even more.............its better than rotting in snoul.


so back in the van with our trustee driver Han, dats his name, not coz i suddenly remembered, but because he msg me recently.

so han and his millenium falcon took us off to a snails pace towards Siam Reap.


road,road,road,road,flat land flat land flat land, animals animals

then they decided to take a shortcut! im never happy to haer something like that, since we aint even on a decent road anyway.


so Han takes us into a gigantic estate, where u couldnt see anything now but rubber trees and an even lousier road, i mean single path where some busses even passed thru.


and we even get held up by dumb goats blocking the whole road, it took about another hour just to get out, and u can see from the drivers face that he wondered whether it was actually worthwhile, coz there were several forks in the road and i guess he just guessed most of the way.


road road road nite time, frightening road road road then small but rapid vibrations!

some weird mini humps.......dat could only mean one thing


CIVI-fuckin-LIZATION!

we had arrived, we put up at a neat guest house, we looked for food, we ate, we slept like how we slept on most of the journey there, except without any vibrations!

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

The Van Diaries Day 2

get up to the sound of my monotone alarmclock-handphone

head to the breakfast area, i think it was 5USD for some crummy eggs and toast, but the coffee was satisfying,

the view was elevated, and this was probably the high-life for people around here.


WE head off to see the city, on our trusty toyota van


went to a couple of markets, squatter areas, riverside, all for the same purpose

to shoot all the poor naked children selling just about anything from birds to drinks

the most enterprising were the kids near the riverside

they would sell birds to be freed, and some flowers and fruits


they even jumped into the dirty river,

actually they somersaulted


they would carry each other and keep jumping in and coming out and jumping in

so we could get our shots, but i guess they were obviously showing for tips


mike gave them something for their efforts, like a couple of bucks

and 1USD goes a long way over here,

maybe the world should follow their model

a buck for all ur needs, food,clothes,entertainment


so after seeing the capital, we start our 7 hour journey to a town call Snoul

our base to head out to the schools in the outskirts.


the roads are single-laned, dusty, packed, kinda like Malaysia in the 80s

not roads, my mistake, their highway

and they have 2 major ones flanking the Tonle Sap, and i'd be travellin both at the end of the experience.


back to the journey,
it kinda starts when we pass the 1st bridge outta Phnom Penh, dunno what its called

straight away u see hordes of cars,vans,motorcycles,bicycles on both lanes

the vans take the cake stacking ppl up the roof, sometimes even motorcycles

hell even the motors could squeezr about 4-5 ppl, all sitting sideways like the Vietnamese


many restaurants on the road, even stalls selling tons of french loafs, really good stuff

with all the good food,we decided to stop where they sold spiders,frogs among other stuff

and me of course devouring a huge spider and half a mini-frog......once you've had an insect the rest are pretty much the same

the frog wasnt too bad, only later on i would realise where they'd collect them from....


after that we kept driving and driving and driving and driving and driving and driving

the whole place is flat, the tallest thing were sea coconut trees

kampung houses all around, paddy fields, buffalos actually resting int the water hiding under giant lotus leaves.


cows,cows,cows, lotsa dogs, naked kids, poor kids, everybody is filled with the dirt of the road

every driver has a surgical mask on

and they happily sell corn amongst other stuff hanging of the racks exposed to the laterite

just slap on some hot butter and it pretty much solves everything, I should know.


so we keep driving and driving and driving......and damn thats only like the first 2 hours

cant sleep, the road is too bumpy, make KL roads feel like a formula 1 track


we drive till the sun goes down, and u cant really see it happening coz of thick overcasts all around


its night, there are no street lights, you just hope that the driver doesnt kill us all, as everyone drives in the middle of the road until uncoming traffic beckons

and WE dont get any more comfortable as our guide Mendy informs us that road accidents has just overtook AIDS as the number one killa in cambodia


i shut my eyes and ask god to forgive all my sins


so after seven hours we finally arrive to this dark town, and we get set up in the best place around

Lyna's guesthouse, equipped with a 14 inch tele, cable, air-con, cold cold cold showers, and a decent bed

everyone else seems to be living in some wooden house that is red from the surrounding mud and dust.

we grab a late bite, good sour fish soups, interesting deer bones (the meat had finsihed) veggies and durian (really tasty ones)


back at the room i doze off watching assault on precint 13th on HBO as i decide not to off the TV to ward of all the surrounding insects.

Monday, October 02, 2006

The Van Diaries Day 1

the airasia flight was delayed again

...typical

couldnt see much from the plane on approach to Phnom Penh, very overcast skies, dunno whether it was rain clouds or just plain haze


by the time we cleared customs, it was already dark with a slight drizzle

and yes we had met our subjects earlier at the LCCT

Ezer and his assistant, forgot his name


they run internet portals ranging from travel to dating (supposedly doing very well)
so this guys decided to build a school in the outskirts of Cambodia for 20k US out of their own pockets

and so me, my boss mike and colleague jeremy decided to shoot a doco for them for free

but mike had some other intentions also...


back to the Phnom Penh airport, we met up with our guides Mendy and the driver Tan or something like that

at first i thought they were just the cabbies, but being driven in a Lexus 4wd, i figured they were the hired hands.


off to our hotel, the royal golden something something, facing the river where all the tourist hand out

couldnt see much as things were pitch dark, but its kinda like driving thru bangkok, only with more older buildings and less dense. no jams at that hour.

only thing i remembered was that there were a shitload of clinics/hospitals/pharmacies

and huge signs like "DOnt take weapons!" as suppose to our Tak NAk campaigns.


reached the hotel, didnt look like there was anyone living in it, got into a lift built for 5 cambodians and could only fit 3 malaysians

room was pretty decent, cable had more channels than astro, and most importantly ESPN,

i didnt have to scarifice premiership action, but that was only for the night.

sprayed some anti-perspirant while waiting 4 the others to bath and shit


went out for some grub

all mostly small restaurant/pubs, all full of white ppl , kinda like Khao San

stop at a place, had Khmer food, kinda like vietnamese/thai.chinese

vegetables, chicken, soup, the usual fare.

it all looked quite bland, but once u taste it, its pretty darn good

had their local beer Angkor, tasted as lame as Leo beer

little did i know how the Wat connected with everything in cambodia

so continued to talk politics, business, trivia and shit with our new group

the usual stuff

went back to the hotel, saw the matchess, reading scored againts MU, i fell asleep

Thursday, September 21, 2006

21 Sept 2006

a day befor the finals of one in a million

the show ive been workin on most, this year


whenever a long show ends, its like the whole year has ended.


but this time, there isnt any grand feelings about the final show

maybe because it has come one two many times


or maybe because my entire team are fed up trying to work with an inexperienced-egocentric-pitiful-HEAD,

i shant use the word leader, coz he's more of a coward than anything else,

ever prepared to blame everyone else for his short comings, except for himself.......of course.


but if i spend time writing about that aspect of the year gone by, it'll probably take another whole year to complete.


so i'll take things in a positive manner like I always do, and treat my last day working with him as the happiest day of my life, even happier than the other finals i've done!

yes nothing feels better than the taste of freedom from ur oppressors!

and on the subject of freedom, i remember talking to my lawyer-friend how we always have to fight for some small form of freedom,

there isnt any way around it really, without a fight , i guess there would be nothing to be learned or appreciated.

we are all born into this worlds as slaves, be it at the start to our parents

and later on to addictions like drugs, greed, lust etc.

(addiction comes from the word enslaved in latin, or something like that)

so i guess its everybody's duty to fight for their freedom, if they want it of course.

i never understood fighting before until now, i always wanted to be a lover, but in the end, u cant always sit in your comfort zones ignoring everything wrong that goes on around you.

its not like im all hyped out to travel to some war torn country to start some jihad and stuff,

im more concerned on the smaller scale, like fighting for your dignity, fighting for respect, fighting for your survival.

i didnt choose a business job, or some money making thing as my craft

i decided to do work that i'dlove, love meaning i wouldnt mind not getting paid much for it


but when u dont get paid much, and you still have to worry about bastards around you that dont know what they are doing......thats when we have to fight

and i love kicking ass for what is right, and just


coz in general, we malaysians are one motherfucking lazy lot

i know, coz i am one

but now im willing to FIGHT

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Gong Li kills Miami Vice


Isabella.......

....whos dumb idea was that to have some chinese gal called isabella, drug-dealer, but is freakin chinese!!!

i hope it wasnt michael mann's idea, coz he's one of my idols

-but i guess everybody lets u down once in awhile


why couldnt they just get some hot latino chick or something,

i mean gong li is still hot despite her wrinkles, but when she talks english, the only way you're gonna get a hard on is by closing your ears.


terrible.......so not sexy,romantic,decent dialog-acting, whatever....

u can understand what she says, but it's like collin farrel is having a love story with a piece of talking cardboard......and yes the love story is a big part of the show,

hence....that BITCH spoiled most of the movie!


terribly disappointed, maybe coz i was so looking foward to the show,

i still like every frame of the show without gong li talking though (yeah even those where she just shuts up and looks pretty)

michael mann still delivers a realistic point of view to undercover police work (dont mind the ferrari's and shit)

im talking more about the action, all the shooting and shit, damn cold and real.

i still love all the glam of miami, dunno whether i was brainashed when i was young watching the TV series, didnt unserstand much then, but i never forgot the opening montage, all that flamingos and percussion shit.

ah, i still love it till today, and i feel the movie gives you all that, just with a harsher edge


so gong li, i forgive you, coz you still hot

its still a must watch movie

Sunday, September 03, 2006

Soares to my throat

im currently down with the tonsillities

havent had it in awhile, but it's one of those infections i've been battling my whole life, especially when i was young

im just prone to tonsillities, execpt for the time i started smoking, i guess all the tar must have killed everything in the throat including all bacteria and virus.


it's a really sucky infection coz it hurts to eat, and i love eating, and having no appetite due to the pain of swallowing, really sucks, it sucks so bad i can't even suck anything without feeling all the lumps in my throat flare up.


the fever that comes along with it kindza sucks too, ive been sleeping for the last 3 days, non-stop, and i still feel sleepy, i even get the chills when the whether is like humid and hot like hell.

i take my medication and lozanges (which i never find the effectiveness in) and even try to battle it out with gargles of warm salt

my fever is getting better but my throat is still screwed up, soon i'll have to buy some honey and lime juice, apparently its good, and gonna start drinking some herbal tea, and whatever

coz im freakin irritated on my irritation!

and all i can really do now is write about it till it heals

damn you tonsils!!!!

Friday, August 25, 2006

Tears to my eyes



You make me happy, when skies are grey!


"They've had patience with me and the Gaffer's always been good with me, just telling me to take my time and in the end it's paid off." -the great Nowegien


It certainly has.

3 years since I've seen Ole score a goal, and I'm damn glad i waited almost the whole match on a Thursday, 3 am morning to see it.


A true hero to all MU fans and an example of perseverence for all.

Thanks for all the memories Ole, thanks for sticking in there, thanks for making the whole trip as emotional as can be.

You are our Solksjaer, our only Solskjaer!

O....le, ole, ole, ole
Ole.......Ole......

Monday, August 21, 2006

Let the football do the talking


The boys are back.

“It’s proved that people who have been saying things about us don’t know either of us,” Rooney told Sky Sports. “We let our football do the talking and I thought Cristiano was brilliant and he scored a great goal.”


i've been telling everyone, this was to be MU's year,

some say all fans would say that.

True, i'm a freakin fanatic, a red till i die, but dats wat gives me the knowledge and the observence that fergie has been slowly building his new fledgelings, and they hav always been on a progressive curve.

if u werent fanatical or objective, u wouldnt hav noticed it.


i always knew that rooney and ronaldo were friends, not just professionals, but true friends.

and even the best of friends hav their controversies, and its nothing like teddy and cole in the past. what ever happened to roo and ron at the world cup, is far behind them.

sure the boo-boys will taunt the portugese winger, but that will only be their own undoing as the boy-fired-up-can-kill.


so im glad they opened the season with a bang, sir alex knows the EPL is a league of zero tolerance, a game lost can decide everything.

we are ready, there is nothing more for me to say.......

let the football do the talking


1st week of EPL 06/07

MU 5 Fulham 1

and yes we scored all the goals, even fulham's.

Friday, August 18, 2006

Cinderelli

House work

the bane of my existence.


Lets see when i was young i would hate cleaning up anything, but my dad being chinese and all saw it as some major sin between my brother and me, so he decided to exorcise the dirty demons and make us godly when it came to cleanly.

Sometimes as a kid u had to motivate urself to do all these shite, like i'd pretend to make roti canai whenever i had to fold all my clothes.

coz my dad would open the drawers sometimes and freak out, so i'd to do the whole motherload.

dats probably why i was so obsessed with the mamak, but who isnt eh? no kid wouldnt find the making of roti the most splendid sight and smell in the world. Plus i grew up in klang.


i'd usually think im in the millitary and shit thanks to shows like full metal jacket, tour of duty, platoon bla bla bla. washing plates, cleaning the floor, picking the dog shit all in hope that charlie would come crawling the back yard for me to KILL! demented yet fun for all young boys.


fast foward to college life,

total, unimaginable FREEDOM!

i didnt have to clean shit up, my sergeant major of a dad wasnt around to be nitpicking on every speck of dust that lay on the ground.

like a junkie i took to not cleaning anything up for days, even my own body!

I even lived with roomies that couldnt give a shit if they're loaf of bread in the cupboard degraded to a pile of moss, they'd rather buy a new loaf and keep it next to the rotten one.

There were more cigarette ash then dust on the floors, living with graphic designers, they would leave all sorts of cut up shit everywhere, and like seinfield, the doors were always open for more random assholes to keep walking in and out piling up the sands of their shoes to wherever.

that was the life.


Now working life,

all the teachings of the father finally make sense. u cant live in a place u dont take care of.
so the fact that i cant hire a maid or purchase one of those robot vacuumes. i guess i have to sacrifice some PS time to clean up.

after spending my fri afternoon cleaning up my room and living quarters, and the night before preparing dinner, i suddenly realise how it feels like to be a housewife.

i mean cooking for 4 ppl is like a mini task altogether, u have to balance the time of all sorts of dishes and get it all done by the time everyone gets home.

the painful part is completing the mission just on time, and everyone ends up coming and hour later and all the food gets cold u might just have heated up a can of spam or something.

and all the chores housewives have to do on a daily basis, alotta manual labor. I mean i've realised all these things before, but dont we often forget about it.

so to all housewives out there especially my mom, i hope i coz less trouble for you all in the future, you are the most unappreciated lot in the world even lawyers get more respect.

Thursday, August 03, 2006

Happy Bday Meara


lets see, i think she was born in '97, so she's nine, standard 3, yeah that makes sense.

going back to penang to see her and her friends have a pirate themed party thanks to johnny depp and co for inspiration.

i dun remember having any themed party, in fact bdays for me are either standard, nice, or plain crappy or weird.

the turning point was when i had a pizza for my bday instead of a cake, im guessing i was in either late primary or early secondary,

although i did like the concept i guess bdays become more of a weird thing for me.

and my 21st bday, i did absolutely nothing in australia coz everyone was having exams, and i hate to be the type to hint about their bday.

but i understand why ppl do it, i mean it should be a day to remember no?

or when u get older, its more like a death countdown.


and gifts..........just like xmas, is always a bloody pain in the butt especially when u hav to buy it for someone u know well enough that u've already bought all sorts of shit for.

for ppl u dun know so well, its easier, there are always PR gifts and shit,

and kids are great, i mean there is so much cheap shit out there that kids go gaga for!

thats why CNY is a celebration that makes sense, u give other ppl money, no headaches,straight to the point, if i like u i give u lotsa money, if i hate u, i still give u 4bucks minimum and if i dun know u, see ur lucklor.




seasons greetings to all

Sunday, July 23, 2006

Tsk Tsk Tsk


these guys are suffering from some post world cup syndrome, they so bored they decide to shove their boots and amongst other things to their fellow students.

yup if you havent heard about the UPM students harrasing their chinese peers, go to youtube and search for UPM students, or bullies, or I'd search for arseholes.

one of the best pieces of video journalism i've seen in malaysia for a long time, thick in the action, decent picture quality and a true depiction of the state of the nation.

be shocked, be angered, or like me, unfazed.
I've seen these mats my whole-life, give them a degree, a multinational company, nothing changes, if you are born shit in ur brains it hardly cleans up.

Friday, July 21, 2006

Top of my head

WORK

-gonna have a live show tonight, gonna be mixing the visuals, pretty used to it, only the fact that the mixer tends to screw around assures me of some blunder tonite.
-morale is on an all time low on this project, totally could not be excited whether another contestant will capture the hearts of the malaysian ppl, bla bla bla, its all work for me, and I've been regretting not putting my foot down at the start of the year, i will remind myself to be stronger after this project, and NEVER do another idol-like show again, 3 years is an eternity.

HEALTH
-just recovered from food poisoning, at least i think i have since stuff down south is still murky.
-keep forgetting about my gout till my feet start to tingle with crystal pain.
-and even further back in my mind is my obesity, which thanks to the food poisoning, i got to knock off a few inches, or maybe half an inch.

MONEY
-bought more airasia stocks during the worldcup only to see it crash to an all time low, but am pretty confident they wont close shop
-i tend to not notice my bank balance whenever i hit the atms, knowing in the back of my mind that the numbers dont seem to be increasing even after i receive my paycheck
-dun think im spending much though

FAMILY
-dont see much of them nowadays, really starting to wonder whether i should do more as a son

MYGIRL
-Fuan got a new job at MZ motorrad some german motorcycle company, it's at glenmarrie, hopefully she stays at my place more often coz it only takes like 5 mins to get there
-we busy as usual, but are lucky to see each other a lot
-it's all good here

MYDOGS
-I hope they are still alive!

MY PlaySTATION
-is dead!!!!!!!!!! oh how i will mourn it till PS3 comes out

MYCAR
-i dunno, i've been driving my dads truck for so long, i hope AH BEN still loves me

a few more months till a new year comes, i can only hope that less ppl stop dying or getting killed and i should be so lucky to worry about the more trivial things the next year wil bring.

Monday, July 03, 2006

Come On England


Aint he a happy bitch.

That's twice, against this bitch,

and even more times with other teams since the '70s

England are just hopeless in penalties, i personally think they shouldnt even bother training on it, just concentrate on winning, coz these blokes will never have the composure.

In brief:

-i think Rooney wanted to step on some Portugese balls
-i dun think he shouldve been sent off
-i dun think a country like Argentina or countries who use to kill each other in wars should be allowed to referee one another in the closing stages, Imagine an Israeli ref in a Palestine vs Iraq match.
-Hargreaves deserves his praises
-Lampard, Gerard, Becks, are all burnt out
-Crouch is still a freak
-Lennon is promising
-the Portugese are still hopeless

and at the end of the day, England will only win when some of the english FA bastards start dying.

....telling a manager his gonna be fired after the world cup regardless, BRAINLESS!

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

In Memorium

Coming home to Sunway on the federal,
noticed the studio apartment project next to carefour,
not more than a few months ago i recall a story of a couple planning to invest in that place claiming it was pretty reasonable and well connected to public transport, the komuter that is.

the couple was my mom's friends, they have 3 sons of whom the eldest i've known from church back in penang.

all of them are pretty much grown up and the retiring couple had dreams of opening a small kopitiam, like OLD KOPITIAM CAFE where they could spend the rest of their lives making small cakes and drinks to make do of time.

the husband, once succesful and healthy had been cursed with liver cancer and the complications that came with it.

I was only an aquaintance, i've probably met him twice in my life,

but that time was long enough to see the bright shining light in him, however weak his body was.

so back to events last week.....i had to attend his funeral.

his family, however prepared they were with his sickness, his final breath must have echoed a pain that will linger on.

in the church he looked presentable as ever in the casket as the ceremony went thru the usual prayers.

a strong gush of wind, kinda signalling the separation of spirit.





off to semenyih, a pretty far off place to lay rest, but a beautifuly crafted by nirvana.

the rain that hammered the procession cleared up instantly as the casket reached the burial grounds as if the man himself opened a big umbrella in the sky for his family and friends.

more songs, prayers, flowers and candles

ashes to ashes, dust to dust

he finally lays to rest, may his family find peace.

Louis Loo

Saturday, June 03, 2006

World Cup Picks

Germany

The host nation, pretty young team, they will have home support, might be enough to take them all the way.

My Prediction: Maybe all the way, most big footballing nation do win it at home
Realistically: At least the semis


Brazil

Need i say more? Favourites and the best when it comes to the beautiful game.

My Prediction: I still dont like them winning so I hope they crash in the semis
Realistically: they can bag the cup as usual

England

my heart still lies with them, however over rated they always seem to be, but this year the squad is finally solid.

My prediction: THEY WIN!!!
Realistically: wont pass group stages, Peter Crouch! Come on!

Italy

i think they have a fantastic squad this competition, and they look more focus and will be serious in not turning into another embarrasing campaign

My Prediction: I hope they're plane crashes during take off in italy
Realistically: I think they can go all the way

Sweden

My favourite dark horse, pretty much the same team as euro, still depending on larsson and ljunberg is still half injured

My prediction: i hope they reach the semis
realistically: they can reach the semis

Argentina

a young hungry skillful team, they can beat anyone if they not wondering what they're lives will be after they win it.

My prediction: they gonna win this
realistically: they can

Holland/Portugal

same bunch of wankers they always are, skillful but wasteful

my prediction: crash out in the second round
realistically: they could go quarters

Ghana

My pick for the african continent, very solid defensive team, they're gonna be the shockers

my prediction: semis
realistically: cant pass group stages

France

Its over for the team and Zidane, some world class players that dont seem to click this time round

my prediction: crash in the quarters
realistically: semis

Spain

got a real good team this time, very midfield packed though, they will have to come up with the goals

my prediction: they could win it
realistically: quarters/semis


and the rest of the teams can suck my balls! but i think teams like Japan, Australia, Croatia, Mexico, Ukraine, Croatia will have my support since Malaysia will never amount to anything, and these teams might have some suprising results, in short they're good betting picks.


so according to my predictions, there are at least 4 teams that can win it. i should hit the mark

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

these roads

its 9.30 am

just came back from work, almost a 24hr day.

dun feel too bad, kinda zombie like though

-it aint over till i drive back from bandar utama to my beautiful bed in sunway, which no seems so far away.

get goin in my ford ranger, with loud tiesto music banging-to-keep-me-awake, very jinjang I know, but i learnt to live with what works, plus it's really nostalgic to drive in the morning knowing you'd never had slept, with techno music reminding you what a great time you had

the difference was replacing hard clubbing with boring editing-not that nostalgic anymore

back to the road,
take a u-turn to get to the LDP heading to Puchong from under the big one utama cross junction with TTDI.

-after the U-turn, can't get back to the flyover, cones are set, have to go under the flyover just to reach the other side-pretty moronic

what the hell, someone knocked a cone done-opportunity taken to illegaly get on the flyover, things are fine.

-approaching the uptown interchange with the SPRINT, the tunnel towards KDU is jamned like crazy, damn it! I ain't even going to work!

take evasive action from the fast lane to quickly zip to the traffic lights that lead me to the NKVE, now having to pay for a quicker ride home.

-can u believe it, it's even more jamned there. what the hell was going on? are there a million people heading to Klang for work?

this time i actually opt to go under a flyover at the taman mayang/mega exit to actually zip past a few cars stuck on the flyover.

all the work, not much progress, get back to the end of the sprint, nearing the PLUS toll,

damn it! the whole jam caused by some taxi-accident, just my luck!

what the hell, get on the highway, head towards subang and realise that Fuan wanted a touch n go card, usually i'd be too lazy to be bothered, but hell, I spent so many hours awake already, might as well pull up at the building after the toll, take time to fill some stupid form and get the card, didnt feel disgruntled, so unlike me.

get back on the truck head towards the federal and all smooth sailing into subang, as much as I hate the NPE dudes for charging so much, they've done what's necessary to ensure traffic get into USJ easier,although geting out is still a bitch, but hell, I live in sunway, so I pay regularly on the NPE to get the hell ou of the shithole.

and after all this hours, i gotta write this down! grab some can food, stuff myself, fold the clothes lying on my bed, take a shower, write my blog, take a good nap and hope not to wake up in the middle of the afternoon hungry.

life's good.

Monday, May 08, 2006

A familiar feeling

Been awhile since I've accessed a computer for free at a cafe, as in the cafe's computer.


The current trend would be to lug around your own laptop an access the internet, wireless.
And aren't laptop's cheap? it used to cost an estate for some glorified calculator to sit heavily on your lap, now its affordable, powerful and light. (thank you taiwan for your cheap labour)


Or people opt for PDA's or PDA Phones, which reminds me, my HP Ipaq's touch screen got totally smashed after I'd mistaken it for something you leave on your lap. Seeing it gets unnoticed after awhile, you tend to stand up while it slips off your lap onto the hard floor, in fact it was carpeted, but it couldnt save the screen nevertheless.

I'm all out of warranty, and I'm pretty sure its gonna cost the same price to fix it/buying a new one.

So that's another expensive piece of machinery down the drain, because nothing is built to last, not cars, not kitchen stoves, nothing.

So if I really get cheap in the future, I might as well not buy any new computers seeing it's always a race to be ahead in technology, plus there are so many outlets to get free access

like such

Now I just have to find more free food options and ride a bicycle, I'll soon be on my way to be a million aire, or at least happy whenever the price of fuel rockets.

Sunday, April 30, 2006

What makes the world go round



This is what the future of football is coming to, good old Russian Money.

This post is dedicated to myself, a bitter MU fan that prays every night that his team doesn't end up like Liverpool-past laurels-never retained.


Mu gets trashed at Stamford Bridge, 3-0,

3 screwed up goals, 2 central defenders and a punk

terrible defending by the Reds, even for a neutral, what a lame effort to try and spoil Chelsea's party.

Rooney probably not making it to the world cup, it can't get any worse.

I've never been ashamed to wear my jersey till the end of that match.

a lot of work is going to be needed,

next year will be the last year for fergie to get things back on track.

lets all hope and wait for the russian money to lose its value and american isurance money to dominate.

Monday, April 24, 2006

back on my feet again, so insecure


just back from the one ina million auditions, KL

it's all over now, only 2 auditions, one in east malaysia, the other in west malaysia to decide who will be deserved of a million dollar ringgit career.


i've never spoken to so many people in such a short time for a long time in my life just to find out how their lives are.


finding out contestant stories that is.


and it looks like divorce is on a rise, a lot of people seem to be having many kids, and many wives. i wonder whether they've notice how high fuel will continue to rise and that the world is overpopulated anyway, plus we have more and more foreign workers legal/illegal coming in anyway thanks to the shit going down in Myanmar/Thailand/and the usual Indonesian regions.

alot of people want to be singers, but even more just want to be on TV or be famous, and some people are already singers or TV personalities but they have been lured to join the big million dollar rumble to see who has the biggest dick/voice in Malaysia.

If enough people vote we will truly know how bad the state of the nation is seeing that everybody wants some nobody to inherit such a comfortable prize on the account of contributing to the creation of greatness when it's a mere fantasy to begin with.

but somebody has to win, so who will win? will the show produce an academy of fame? or give someone a passport sinaran to the music industy? or will malaysia have a new Idol? whatever it is, it'll all blast off in a months time, stay tuned on 8tv.

Friday, April 14, 2006

Congratulations and Celebrations

This post is dedicated to my girlfriend who has just sent in her resignation letter today.

I always feel uplifted when I see people standing up for what they believe in and make the hard decisions that need to be done.

Mindshare the leading media planning company in Malaysia one of the various companies under the WPP network, like all multi-nationals have succesfully squeezed their employees overtime on countless occasions and balanced it up with ridiculous incentives like company trips to Barcelona during chinese new year when the majority of their workers are chinese people. (my point of view anyway, my girlfriend did go for the trip)

Brilliant from a business point of view, but flawed considering the amount of loyalty asians have towards their companies as compared to their western counterparts.

If only employers new how to tap into their employees resources just by treating them fairly. I think their profits might actually double and so will their employee salaries, but the tangens will still be appropriate.

but hell everybody here only knows how to calculate in the short term, nobody wants to build anything, everybody is looking out for themselves, including all the CEO's and thats why nothing gets built.

As much as we all like to hate all the CEO's out there, we still need to appoint someone to get things running, to make a personal solution, to take the blame when things go bad. So instead of hiring a selfish boat-jumper to run big money corporations they need to look at the level 5 managers, the great ones who were interested in building something.

Not all the flairy level 4 managers, but the guys who know what they are doing, hire people who know what they are doing and get a simple functional thing done!

is it really that hard? or does everyone has too big of a family to support they have to make sure their dumb cousins or in-laws still make enough money to buy their BMW's at the cost of losing 20 Ferraris for the company.


bosses treat ur workers well, it works, trust me and those who have done so in the past.

Thursday, April 06, 2006

A New Hope



7 points away
can a fluke change the course of english football
can u really compare the current chelsea to keagan's newcastle?
i suddenly find myself believing in miracles
i would luv to snatch the title, but i wont be disappointed if we dont
but lets give the bloody blues the headache of their lives
down to the wire
2 great teams
football has its dramas

Saturday, March 25, 2006

P for Pancetta

have to go on the road soon,

new reality shows, new crap same bullshit.

Preparations? dunno,

1. shave head-saves the hassle of conditioning and shit like that
2. get new shoes- i was never a believer of buying expensive shoes, but man my feet are all crapped out, and im fuckin fed up, pass on the timberlands
3. new phone perhaps?- really fed up with the P900 my dad offloaded to me, i'd rather even use my alcatel but my bro is using it since his phone is dead too.
4. new medicine- i'm constantly running out of pills to stop my gout attacks, must see doctor for ten times more the perscription and hopefully a discount.
5. new experiences? attitude? dunoo?hadjadjadjklkasdljasd

its coming to April can't possibly make it back for ceng beng, have to make an effort to go back to penang for easter at least, another short weekend to find out how my family is doing and not allowing to feel attached before leaving when things are so good to be home.

home

some people live their entire lives in the single plot of land they grew up in, history resonates in the very walls they would have repainted, damaged, stuck posters and picture frames and resealed and repainted again.

all the memories tied in a single household probably overcrowded and messy with everything that is worth nothing in money but still priceless to throw out.

my apartment, only 2-3 years worth of memories is only filled with trash that can be thrown out but trash in itself never ends, it can never be rid off. Therefore it is the one most irritating thing in the whole world that can never be solved, but through it's common tyranny it binds us together.

yes it does

it is but the byproduct of everything we do that has intact all of the memories that have been lost.

so do we get rid of it or not?


i guess it depends how irritating it gets.

crap crap, shit thrash, life

Thursday, March 16, 2006

Episode II : Attack of the Crystals

damn this pain wont seem to go away,

its true what they say, you cant run away from you're sins, they just keep coming back to haunt you.

by sins I mean eating like a freaking pig.

just when I'm on my preventative medicine for my gout treatment, the one where the doc said if I have an attack I should stop and get another set of medicine,.....I get an attack.

And I remember him asking me about whether I wanted some attack medicine the last time, my foot was feeling great, so I says no and he says thats alright just come back if you need more and I says sure thing and therefore I went back.


Different doctor this time, glanced thru my medical card filled with probably 4-5 different scribbles of different doctors...its truly amazing how they even understand any of it, thats why they keep telling children with bad writing to be a doctor (I should know).

Well this chap gladly told me that I knew that he knew that I knew that I needed to loose weight in such a casual way and half-way explaining about the balance between medicine and dieting his phone goes off, then he goes off telling some dumb shmuck to buy something in which the dumb shmuck probably made a mistake....but who cares really.

I almost felt like slapping him, but his frankness and his patience in telling me about my condition (after the phone call) made me appreciate him more and listen to his advice.

So in the end we started talking about TV production where he blabbed how he new one of my colleagues on Idols and later about his nephew who apparently does animation for video games in Canada and that his nephew's company started off with medical animation but found game animation so much more rewarding (financially of course).

All that jazz, I get out, I see a crowd off sick people outside the clinic that wasnt there when I went in, couldn't help but feel guilty for wasting their time, but what they wont know wont hurt them.

I get my drugs, I get my MC, I'm back at home eating another freakin salad,watch Oliver Twist and fall asleep (the Polanski one), and that's pretty much the time I take to get back on the net.

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

gribbles my scribbles

the blood test is out

on the positive note:-

my blood cells are in order

sugar levels are great

electrolites good (all the salt shit)

my piss is great

my hepatitis B immunity is still superb from the jab i had 3 years ago

i have no VD

on a mix note:-

good old fats, overall cholesterol is suprisingly OK

HDL (good cholesterol) is good

BUT triglycerides (fats) are a bit high but not troubling

and LDL (bad shit) is just a bit off the scale, i should be lke a <2.58 mmol/L but I'm a 2.59

so overall not too troubling

on the BAD note:-

i have gout,

my liver is Fucked! means no drinking,

in short i've dranked so much the poisons of alcohol is still lurkin around

all my liver enzym readings are off the roof! but dun worry, the doctor said i wont die just yet, but i've got to work hard to preserve my liver and get my uric asid levels under control.

so word for the wise, drink wisely or you'll pay for it some day,

plus now i've got so much liqour stacked up in my room, i dun even know what to do with it,

not smoking, not drinking, signs of aging

i think i better take up chess or checkers

Tuesday, March 07, 2006

write a gout now

my foots been killin me ever since i was shooting a tv pilot in indonesia

actually it was hurting over there because i was walking all day with my camera but when i came back to KL and rested, everything was fine.


2 weeks later, the bitchin pain comes back, and i didnt sprain it or walk a lot or did much strenous activity at all.


ah what the hell, i just figured i was fat and all, and my feet are giving up, just hav to visit a sensei one day and get it sorted.

never found the time though, and the shit kept getting worse.

so i decided to give my leg some chinese healing when out of the blue my colleague was jokingly suggesting that i might have gout.

*alarm bells ring*

although he didnt he mean anything by it, but all the symptoms i had seemed to point to it, i finally knew what was fuckin my leg up, it couldnt have been a sprain, i didnt do shit.

but then again i'm young, but then again i'm fat

but then again my leg is not that swollen, but then again it was a reoccuring injury

and then i drink a lot

and then i love tomatoes, offals, beef, all types or purine-filled-taste so good-food

and then my mom and uncle have high uric asid levels also

and then i knew i was proper fucked


screw the sensei i had to go to the doctor.

went straight in the morning, limping like a disable freak (same thing happened the night earlier while i struggled to watch Underworld Evolution, fuan had free tickets, IT WAS A VERY DISAPPOINTING SHOW and to point out, PAINFULLY DISAPPOINTING)

had a sandwich when in the clinic, doctor touched my leg, i screamed, he told me i needed a blood test, ask me whether i ate anything, i said the sandwich, he said i should fast, i need to go back the next day, he suggested a full blood test since they are having a promotion anyway only RM 75, i said "sure" might as well face the facts that i'm obese with hypertension and a possible diabetic anyway (the usual malaysian stuff).

so what better last meal to have before i start fasting then McDonalds!

chicken foldover (just to feel a but healthier) value meal LARGE (okay i'm just kidding myself)

stay tuned to find out if i really have gout.......same blog.....same crap

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Tailen

DISTANCE
-about 2 hours 10 minutes, if travelling by airasia, add 2 more hours

TRAFFIC
-horrendous but orderly, can also take trains to avoid traffic, as good as singapore.
-Cabs, very nice, mostly new toyota's, and pretty damn cheap, but u get stuck in the jamlah.
-tuk tuk, more expensive for more danger, worth the experience
-motorcycle taxi's, u must be one cheap bastard, cuts traffic effeciently
-boats, i didnt take one...damn it!

PEOPLE
-as good as it gets, nobody is more patient
-they smile a lot even though they are cheating you, but u cant understand a word they say either, so everyones happy

DOGS
-fat as hell, well fed street dogs that are happy and don't bark.

HOTTEST THING in BANGKOK
-Rotiboy, the line is pretty phenomenal.

FOOD
-good, good, good, cheap, even the bugs.

SHOPPING
-cheap shit everywhere, and everything else is pretty expensive.

RED LIGHT DISTRICT
-i didnt have time, i so wanted to see flying bananas

WEATHER
-hot, humid, rain, same shit over here

TV
-lame, adverts are good

MOVIES
-more up to date with thai subtitles, and of course thai shows which are generally better than ours.

THE CONCERT BANGKOK100ROCK

deus
-oklah, only heard their last song, was too busy drinking outside

Ian Brown
-lightly entertaining

Franz Ferdinand
-class, pure performers that kept the festival alive and rocking

Oasis
-i dun fancy them much but they did a good job, although i kept falling asleep

FUTURE HEADS
-oklah, better than dues i think, watched them from outside, not done drinking

MAXIMO PARK
-great! I was fuckin drunk

SNOW PATROL
-i love these guys, the only band that bothered to sing, did well but was a bit too slow for a rock festival, plus i was sobering up.

PLACEBO
-i dun fancy them much either, but they did well to close the show.

Saturday, February 04, 2006

Of MU and other things

Damn it,

(the 4-3 loss to Blackburn)

Congrats to Sparky, he'll make a great manager someday.

New insight to RIO's name the "I" and "O" also phonetically spells out "aiyooooooo!"

my reactions exactly to the own goal, which i thought was as much as Van der Sar's fault also.

But hell, Chelsea won the league, I mean is going to win the league anyway. But SHIT! Liverpool will probably take 2nd place.

Ah that's 05/06, but I know with every drip of red blood cells in my body, that the Reds will keep marching on.

On to other matters

CNY holidays coming to a close, which spells WORK WORK WORK

This year's kinda tough on the working scene, not in the confines of 8tv anymore (wait a minute, it's not like there's a difference on that point) more importantly, not working on one mega project (Malaysian Idol) a year this time.

Starting on the outside with more programs to get done,

more programs=more headaches=more fear=more anger=more hate= more suffering

but thanks to all the less fortunates in the world, that face tougher problems like dying of starvation or dying of politcal powers or dying of listening to the same crappy songs everyday on the radio.

My spirits remain HIGH, especially after i take a look at Malaysian TV,

Now who says mTV(malaysian tv) is crap? unentertaining? full of artistic/lazy masturbation?

I admit I've said it many times, but just today as I was watching Malaysia's fear factor/Celebrity edition, I enjoyed myself. I really wanted all of them to puke their ass off during the eating stunts, it didnt happen but they were horrified enough to cry.

Juita Viden (production house for fear factor) is still in my good books.

Soon after I flicked to Blast Off semi-finals, and that really took the cake.

Who wouldnt enjoy a talent show without TALENT?! I mean the producers must have been smarter than those guys who created Big Brother. How did they know they could still get viewers to watch a bunch of performers who wouldn't even be allowed to perform in the Ship and worst still spend money to vote for them?

Hell, reminds of Malaysian Idol, but at least the Idol judges still opened a can of whoop ass when they needed to, on Blast Off you get ACIS smilling half the time, and Jo Flizzowwwww my Nizooww telling a bunch of lousy rockerz that they still have potential.

For heaven sakes, this aint white people! We're Asians, we should be telling the brutal truth, and let these buggers cry about it, and hope they come back bigger and stronger.

But who's watching anyway.

Then next comes Doop on Ntv7, damn, i wont even bother to comment, but I admit it wasnt as bad as the first time I saw it,just that, they runnin out of celebs, i dun even know half the ppl they doop, why cant they just doop Mahatir or Annuar or Karpal, im sure the ratings will rocket.

then I switch to HBO, where i get a glimpse of dreamcatcher, a show i've seen before,

hell, the show goes from a group of friends who get strange powers after helping a retard, but then a virus is spreading in the cabin and woods where they are hanging out in, but no, it turns out to be some alien shit, and the retard boy was an alien all along...blablablablabla

and the worst part is, I still enjoy it! even the first time! it so crap you can't be bothered getting all stressed up about it, u just force urself to enjoy it so that the universe can still move foward.

Thats the mTV scene in my world, so I'm gonna say a little prayer, something I don't do often.

Lord Jesus, please help me make good shows for people to watch on the TV although it is an instrument of the devil. Amen.