can't get it right

Big lion small lion

2011-11-14T10:56:00.002+08:00

All alone now, without a tan fright in sight

Squares on square, sitting down by the riverside on a Monday, other ppl that is

Colonial excursion coming to an end, a whiff of cigarette smoke in the air, not mine

The one quiet patch in the bustling city, kind of like the imbi alley back home, no porridge in sight over here

At least theres still the. Big iconic bank tower, overshadowing me, reminding me where i came from

Who knows where im going to next, but this wont be the last time i enter the lions den, or the dragons head

Little bird on my window door

2011-11-12T17:26:00.002+08:00

Little bird on my window door

I cant quite make out what bird you are

Just a silhoutte as the day curtains are stuck

A bit hairy, must be wet from the rain, the dreaded rain that is keeping me from infinity heaven

An extremely tall window, a room made for giants, how many have came before me, starring out to the sky, pondering the future, while still giddy from a hot bath

You must be talking to your friends little bird, i can hear you both chirp, but can only see one

When will you fly away, away from this supposed dragon's head

You must be waiting for the sun like all of us

We shall see who makes the first move.

Loysel

2011-10-19T16:34:00.004+08:00

A blog entry a year keeps the mind in focus.

The longer i reside in this concrete jungle the more interesting the cracks appear to be.

Lunch at meds, coffee at A Curious Teepee, lame shoot being held, discovered the fantastic green soccer journal.

Coffee part 2 at the Kallang River, my area is probably the coolest place in Singapore.

From mocha to latte and the help of a new adventure in the football world, cave time has been resurrected, and life per normal can resume.

The men are looking more stylish than the ladies, the foreigners seem more local than the citizens. But love will always remain the same, just days away from the big one,

Open up your eyes and you will see....

same auld story

2010-12-31T11:47:00.003+08:00

Scorcese has been speaking to me lately.

Bought Goodfellas, saw raging bull on MGM, and was tempted to get the comedian at HMV.

My essence has been knocking at my door, the real one true passion. It was supposed to be a tough year, and it most aspects it was, but i managed to push harder and achieved new heights.

Shall i concentrate on the path that has been laid out to me in the new year?

Or will i have the time or effort to balance more than i can chew on?

WELL, what else am i supposed to do?

LIVE free or die trying

P.S., nothing timelier than the apartment, jack lemmon to ponder about all this

the last airbender

2010-12-17T22:17:00.002+08:00

how would you feel if your entire race was wiped out?

shall i remember? or shall i forget?

at the end of the day, it was always educational,

always took life with a pinch of salt, but am always secretly looking for doses of humanity that can inspire new ideas and the breaking of boundaries

it's all sand castles, it takes 2 times the effort to build, but it usually gets swept away by the smallest of waves

maybe that's why it always gets instant appreciation, knowing that it has such a short lifespan

my castle had been broken twice and it's finally been swept away, may it forever be immortalized by it's worthy admirers

and may we continue to build castles in the sand

(:)

2010-10-14T22:54:00.002+08:00

knock knock,

who's there?

no one...........

With pinpoint GPS technology, and millions of radio waves penetrating our walls and minds,

it's still very much possible to be ignored.

Unconsciously I might add.

What was all the big push about getting connected.

Maybe so we can all live in one big happy world,

that we'd be more educated about all our differences, that we can move forward.

We have in some aspects, on the other hand it just feels like nothing has changed.

What's the sweetness without the bitter, just a whole bunch of neutral gray fluff.

Time will always be the real indicator in the end,

it measures everything up, represents a relative value

it's worth more in gold or any other precious metal

So won't you pick up the f**kin phone and stop wasting my time!

the walls start breathing

2010-10-08T00:06:00.002+08:00

when i'm on you're off

ready you're not

tired you're restless

even random thoughts escape me nowadays

more like reverberating images of my subconscious flickering in my minds eye

enough sleep, maybe not enough nutrients

motivation hanging by a thread at times

where did it all begin,

am i coming to full circle or just the tip of the freakin iceberg

hallelujah

down on the ground looking up

2010-09-19T11:15:00.003+08:00

i lay on my bed, staring at my own underwear hung like a roasted duck on a bamboo pole

why did i laid out my rented furniture in such a manner baffles me.

i'd rather have sun in my face then face the sun as i constantly depend on my laptop for work.

oh the wonders of a good macbook, now that i've gone to experience a whole new level of TV appreciation now that internet streaming is what i depend on

it ain't too bad at times, you listen to more music, read more books..........and stare at your own underwear

thinking where it's been, around the world in a laundry bag in east timor?

all the friends they've lost along the way after years of spin cycle, loss elasticity

they have the dirtiest job amongst all other clothes, nobody truly appreciates them unless they belong to the lingerie caste

yet we can't live without them, unless you love going commando

am i a brief or a boxer, am i supporting a big dick or a crooked one

when will my elasticity expire?

keepin touch

2010-04-24T16:39:00.002+08:00

a faint whisper

a nudge of a finger

a hint of a smile

courtesy or just plain decency,

how long have we known each other to just ignore the occasional presence

does anyone really care what anyone thinks about something as personal as this?

or do we just continue to stray off to different directions

we'll meet again sooner or later

it's inevitable

so keep in touch

feelin the heat

2010-03-17T12:18:00.002+08:00

it has always been hot during the CNY period, hot and dry

this time however it seems to be extending itself to a longer period and you can only wonder how bad global warming is really getting to

it's as bad as having to resort to ice cream for breakfast apart from cereal, shorts to the office and abstinence from spicy food

the sun never seems to leave us back home, while it always fails to show up when i was in England, it's the total opposite, shit cold

this small period in my life has been fluctuating not only on the temperature side but on my fate as well, in my career, in my health and my outlook of the future

it's always some 3 year cycle for me, and i always thought it would end at some point...

but what would be the fun in that

doing and expecting the same things, some people die for it, I never had it

and i'm not complaining, on a whole, coz i do at times

i just end up getting a lot of time in between to really think hard and peacefully on the purpose of just being around, the purpose of frying my arse off day to day in the sun

just got to flow with it and find some shade whenever i can

coz feelin the heat is always better than being left out in the cold

more while i can

2010-02-02T11:06:00.002+08:00

so arsenal ended up getting humiliated at the emirates,

first off by their own hands through almunia, then rooney came storming in for the second,

lets not forget nani who seemed to be coming into his own recently, he dummied 3 players for the first goal, then found rooney on the break in the second

it was also the hardworking run of park ji sung who started the move in the second and kept running to pull away the defenders, he got rewarded with a goal of his own in the second half, on the break, he had 2 or 3 options, decided to please himself at the near post, the night would end 3-1 thanks to a vermaelen deflection, funnily enough he's the sharpest scorer the gunners have, that's why they started with 6 midfielders. wenger learning yet another tough lesson.

it never ever seems like united's season, especially after a tough christmas period, but somehow they always stick in there, and now they are in their favourite position, chasing the leaders, nipping at them till the final point, when they make the decisive break, and like all races, they had paced themselves well, at least i'm hoping, but i will always believe in them for some reason, for all the problems on pitch and off, there's always something in united that no other top club really has at the current moment, the genuine determination to work for the club.

and that has thought me millions

things that come in 3

2010-01-31T17:38:00.002+08:00

before the start of every race, there's always a countdown from 3,

why not 2,1, go

of just.....race!

why can't it be 4?

why is 3 times a charm? 3 strikes you're out

three lions, third eye blind, triple threat

some weird tone in the metaphysical that dictates the rhythm of fate.

it somewhat seems to apply to me

and that now, after another 3 years of building something, it is all over.

i usually know when things come to an end, but this time, it's more tragic, without much notice and all we do in life is just carry on,

i wish i could mourn forever, but hey it's normal, it's not like i've lost someone i knew well.

but it's still lost, losing something i've helped create, something i thought would out live me

how foolish i was to care about something material

maybe because i believe that it's much more than that,

RIP my good friend, i hope to see you again.

the end of 2009

2009-12-15T10:20:00.002+08:00

what a forgettable year it has been,

everybody was stressed out, money was scarce

but wait a minute, there were those who got going when the toughness was getting it on

those like my pinot noir basil plant, what started out as an inch of leaf and plant is now a good 3 feet worth of hardy wild basil that stretches form the dark spots of my balcony to the ledge of warm sun.

plants are living things and as slow as they are, they still grow faster than us, faster in a good environment, and even when resources are scared they adapt and find new methods to exist. they are survivors and they will be around longer than any of us.

is this the jealousy that causes us to continually take more than what they offer us unconditionally?

or are they silently waiting for retribution, a day when their numbers are so limited, they then decide to take away the one thing that keeps us alive, oxygen.

that's human nature right at it's worse, we harm the ones that love us the most

where do we go now?

2009-10-18T10:09:00.002+08:00

staring at the cursor blinking,

fingers frozen, mind has stopped thinking

what be the point of another endless rant

that brings nothing more than a life wasted in believing

i envy the oblivious

i despise the obvious

but what am i to do, if i continue to lie in the comfort of conforming

what good things must come to an end?

what lies we tell ourselves to protect the big truths.

enough..................

fuck you i won't do what you tell me,

motherfuckerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrz

hello again

2009-10-15T12:09:00.003+08:00

it's been quite awhile since my last confession

there was facebook and more focus on work, thank god im not yet a twitter addict

but now laying on my bed, shitting fluids the whole night, with titanic on star movies, i kind of remembered you my friend, the one that is always there

at least if nothing happens to google that is

i'm older, hardly any wiser, more tired's the word, make slightly a bit more cash then i used to, but not really conquering the world in my prime years.

I'm no Lewis Hamilton, no Cristiano ROnaldo, even if they are younger than me, they were of a different cut.

I'm what you could call the regular , was born a grande, but i'm hoping to be a venti.

there are a lot more worse off and there are also many having a better deal,

but as i watch Titanic yet again on cable, we are all the same when death comes a calling, it;s what you do with the cards dealt in your destiny,

i;m the king of the world........if i think i am.

just chillin

2009-05-13T12:49:00.001+08:00

last day off. Start breakfast with half a pint of guiness. Bloggin on handphone. Responsibility is just round the corner.

cutting edge

2009-05-10T17:10:00.004+08:00

vanity,

it never got to me, maybe that's why i look like the scruffiest looking thang around in my late 20s. maybe it was that line princess leia used on Han on hoth, scruffy looking, hell, solo was a pretty cool guy, ppl still liked him despite his scruffy outlook.

and the longer my hair grew, it just ended up like a natural luke skywalker do, so why bother getting it styled?

needless to say, the saloon is one of my less frequent hangouts....it was more to barbers. yeah you know the type ur dad used to go to? for the real man cut, where they take a safetyless blade and try their best not to slit your throat while singing their favourite bollywood anthem.

I just came back to penang to have one of those, just RM 8 for a cut and shave....it's dirt cheap, almost the same price in vietnam.

the difference however is they do a much better job in Nam.

over here they rush it, they treat ur face like cow's skin and i end up bleeding on my way home, but up north, you can actually get some grade A cut's and they take their damn time to give you that close shave, so no blood and they'll even clean ur ears and nose if you want to......but that's something i can manage on my own.

maybe it's something the french leftover, good coffee, great bread and professional barbers. to me i think it's just good ol commie pride.

country road

2009-05-07T17:14:00.002+08:00

it's more like flight path

the island heat reminds me why i left, but the cool after the sunset, reminds me where i belong

food portions are small but extra servings are always welcomed

if you see the same bus driver that picked yer up when yer was just a wee lad, still up and running, with a cigarette in his mouth.........you know yer just going to live forever

things may have changed here and there, you actually have to request that your si ham in your char kuay teow be undercooked, or else they'll murder it.

but if you can hear the waves crash on the rocks and sand, you know there's more to life than skyscrapers and starbucks

more romance in rome

2009-05-07T05:31:00.001+08:00

we going to take on the catalan giants

in our favourite european away ground

bye bye messi, it's time to give you a taste of some united pain.

floors

2009-04-27T10:14:00.002+08:00

the bathroom floor's dry when you're not around

how will i know that you've been up early preparing for the daily grind

the living room doesn't move, not an inch

how will i know where you've laid your head asleep or busy watching the tele

and worst of all,my bed is cold on the hottest nights

how can i dream of a better tomorrow

they sing for you

2009-04-26T20:10:00.002+08:00

you can be tired of slaving the entire day

frustrated at everyone that throws their bullshit on you for no apparent reason

and just plain depressed at the way the world has/will turn out.

but 5 balls hitting the back of the net for the team u love,

makes everything just ok.

that's when we can put our trust back into the human race.

the best things are the simplest of pleasures.

viva la vida

2009-03-30T09:40:00.002+08:00

80.22 that's what you left me

scrapping the bottom of the bottom yet every moment seems worth it

when you restart things get clearer, life gets richer

*&^%$#

by far the best concert i've ever been to, coldplay, that little band my brother introduced to me when he came back from his working stint in Liverpool, their charismatic wave had yet to hit our shores, but once yellow got out to my ear drums......there was just no turning back.

sooner or later everybody thought chris martin was kermit on drugs, but i've always had an affinity to singers with unconventional voices, corgan, brett anderson etc.
It boils back to x-factor, you might not hit the right pitch, look the look or walk the walk, but if you can connect to millions.........there's more than meets the eye.

then they released a rush of blood, everyone thought they had gotten super soft, almost canto-popish. But i just thought it was perfection to harmonics, take everything secondary and push and repeat the harmony. the rest only warmed up with a cool video for the scientist and clocks (the song that swept america for some reason)
My personal favourite to date would be amsterdam. COz time is on your side is on your side................and truth is.....warning sign could not get out of my head for the longest of time.

sooner or later it was time for x&y.......first heard the single speed of sound.......i thought "what the hell is going on?" it was a decent track but nothing really pulled me emotionally the thing that coldplay was always good for
but when i got my hands on the album, fix you just blew me away......along with talk (thanks to some research i have to give kraftwerk some of the credit for a great song). And the rest of the songs just kept getting better and better, really loved it and still wondered how the speed of sound even fit in the album in the first place........but hell it was a damn cool video.......so you gotta love the sound.

two concerts had passed me by in singapore, they first opened for travis and came back with twisted logic......something i was all hyped up for.......but nobody was interested..........it sucks to rock alone...............plus money was always a factor.........watching anything in the island state almost feels like a rip off....they don't let you go crazy yet they make you pay so much for it.

then came viva..... i was so excited on hearing the release, i youtubed some of the first few songs......and to be honest i was left disappointed, only viva la vida seemed coldplayish and it stood out.......the rest was a different world.....violet hill was pretty ok when i heard it on the airwaves but i was still looking for a damn pull...............

that's when lost and lovers in japan saved the day. I wondered how i managed to miss youtubing it in the first place.....i only heard it when prospekts march was being talked about. it hit the spot......it revived the fanatisicm, it convinced me to splash for the concert, it was the best ever thing that has happened to my life to date, they are great performers, i couldn't even tell if anything went wrong or slightly off....coz it didn;t.

i am totally blown over and will contradict everything that points otherwise from what i'm about to say.

they are the best band ever, all their songs rock coz i'm a freakin fan.

ring ring

2009-03-03T22:17:00.002+08:00

My first handphone, Nokia 2110

hand me down from my dad, it was pretty neat back in the day, the problem back then was the battery died really fast, but you could get one of those double sized battery additions, kinda like the new knight rider it transforms your car to a freakin truck.

but it was also fun navigating the menus in those days, you could remember like the menu number codes to jump to an application extra fast, and you could even extend the antennae a further 2 inches, like it made any difference.

Then came the sony erricson, nope....it was just erricson back then, T something, can't remember, another basic piece of crap, it had a flip which had no use what soever except to protect the keypad, so when it eventually broke off, it didn't make any difference, but they did have some snazzy ring tones and shit.

Got fed up after awhile with the conventional brands, soon headed to Alcatel, pretty nice and silvery, had a camera.....damn it was like the latest thing, a camera in a damn phone. Soon enough all the silver came off and it looked like a plastic piece of shit, but yet again it came with a whole other load of interesting tones but it didn't matter, using ur own mp3s was the thing.

so when i totally gave up on technology i went and got those motorolla RM150 phone, which i latter found out was the number one phone in cambodia......i loved everything about it, cheap, batt lasted forever, it had less screen space then my nokia 2110 (my first phone) can you imagine that?

I was so in love, i could drop it a million times and never gave a damn, but the relationship had to end when i couldn't save more than 200 contacts.........

that's when i went in the total opposite direction to my current babe the N95 aka swiss army phone. yup it does everything....even hangs from time to time.

but what's on the horizon? I-phones are always the rave, but it's more like a game console. i think i'll just end up a slave to a blackberry at some point

and that my life will truly be over.......i can't wait to be handphoneless

to be totally disconnected......

start all over again

2009-03-01T16:02:00.002+08:00

united play spurs tonight

league cup final

fergie is set to field his fledglings, since they got the team there in the first place

die hard fan as i am, mu will definitely win, whether or not Harry rested his men at the cost of getting kicked out of the UEFA cup.

that's how bad some of em want to beat the best, or maybe it was just a costly error in underestimation.

it's that time of year when it's hot and dry as hell, and when the rain comes and wash everything away in the evening, we are left with chilly nights.

there is no hunger, but we eat

there is no pain, but we fear

there is just nothing left to do anymore that excites our overstimulated minds and bodies

slaves of redundancy.....i want to appreciate things on a micro level

gone are the days of dominating the world and proving to everyone that their a bunch of idiots,

i'd rather read the most controversial political drama in the papers and start laughing like it's a sitcom, because it doesn't get funnier than cows and cars.

i mean, we are all going to be dead broke really soon, if not already, so like it or not, whether we hate each other, we still got to live in the same places and areas and we have to trust that we'll continue to preserve our way of lives for the good of all.

but nope, it's so much easier to hate, it's easier to destroy, to accuse

try making a car, it's probably easier and more fun to destroy it.

or what about a beautiful statue, or painting

what about a country? are we willing to sacrifice like our forefathers in harsher times or do we flee to wherever it's easier.

do we continue to complain without wanting to take the effort to make things better

nah, what am i talking about, this is our world, we just sit on our ass and let things pass us by, let's wait for something or someone else to bail us out from all our misery and mistakes

lets do absolutely nothing at all

it never ends

2009-01-21T19:50:00.002+08:00

Manchester united just got through to the semifinals of the league cup after beating derby 3-1 (i think) in the reply after coming off a terrible 1 nil defeat in the first leg.

united are top of the table with a game in hand, they recently beat chelsea and bolton, Ronaldo won the FIFA poy award and will most probably leave in the summer that;s if manchester wins everything, and they probably will, league cup, bpl, fa cup....but something tells me, winning the UCL twice in a row might be a bridge too far.

and all that footie update was just because i've been looking back at my previous posts and noticed i always had to talk about footie at the start of the year, making my half season predictions, which i;m proud to say always comes true.

Obama gets sworn in, tried to wake up to watch it live on CNN but was struggling, and it didn't seem like an inspired speech anyway, ain't no JFK stuff, just plain honesty that this year is gonna be rough and tough.

the last time the year of the ox came around we suffered an economy crisis too, nobody knows how long this one will drag, but it'll certainly be another new test for economist and normal people alike to start evolving.

i'm not sure whether i've become the man i wanted to be, or whether all my ideals have gone down the drain.......but somehow i still can live with myself and i know there are others out there who have hell to live with everyday.......

therefore i give praise, to who needs it, deserves it, strives for it.

we shall prevail

what a Difference a day makes

2009-01-19T18:50:00.002+08:00

back on leave for cny. .1st day. Woke up. Went for a run. Spied on girlfriend. Changed spoiled telephone. Bought rare washing machine filter. Bought 4d. Ate chicken rice. Got all birdshit from car washed. Talked to apartment management. Collected pass card. Washed all the dishes from last night. Played winning eleven. Lost in semi. Got hair cut and shave. Now getting tatoo while blogging wit hp.

children should be heard

2008-12-21T10:58:00.003+08:00

they may spend hours on disney, the playstation and even more on the internet

they are getting more disrespectful, violent and actually bigger in size

they are over xposed, overstimulated and plain over the moon sometimes.

but the children of tomorrow will always be a step ahead of us.

though most of the time, we just want them to be a version that was better than what we used to be, only more obedient, quiet and less irritating.

but if we take the time to push ourselves back to what it felt like to be young,

that feeling that all you wanted to do was not be young..........we soon realise that they ARE a better version,

surviving in a much more volatile world.........i guess experience differs from each individual.....but it in our times, it fits the bill.

they are growing faster, and having to make adult decisions much earlier in life

......you know it's hard out there for the young, they deserve a lot more respect, or they will never know what that concept is

you never close ur eyes anymore

2008-11-15T11:39:00.002+08:00

where's the passion people?

are we doomed to be part of the robotic rat race?

why have all the options, if everything leads to the same thing?

what's wrong in accepting our differences?

i know i always love a good buffet, yeah you get stuffed at some point but it's the illusion that's fun knowing that you can have anything you want.

i think i'm going to throw up.

curse of the gap

2008-10-20T23:42:00.002+08:00

how much physical work are people really involved in? at least in the middle class above?

anywhere from 50-80 percent of ppl stare at a computer screen with their neck on their phones, from 9-5, talking about what and how they are going to get things done.

and maybe 20 percent of the time, it gets done to the tee.

the rest of the time it just gets lost in translation.

and then we spend more of the time trying to wash our hands clean of the clutter by shunting responsibility or painting the blame on the people we hate, or don;t really care about, as long as it's not our arses.

all we do is digest whatever we learn and regurgitate the originality of some other genius over and over again, till every story, every product, seems, feels, tastes the same.

and as long as it ends up in the black, be it big or small, we get by.

that's what we do, we get by without even bothering to burn the fat of our souls.

raindrops keep falling on my head

2008-10-15T01:21:00.002+08:00

the storm's a comin, has come

the sat tv only display's a yellow box to make things seem better than a red dot, when in actuality you can see neither picture in both.

if you wait long enough, the white noise just takes over, or for some a blank blue screen

so blue it lights up the dark room funny enough it feels colder through it's brightness.

it's nice to know in bad times that we are not alone, everybody suffers the same fate compared to when things are good.

like how we all lose transmission from time to time

....they keep falling.

maybe this time

2008-10-09T23:51:00.001+08:00

internet connection is so bad, if this ever gets posted, then it's meant to be, if the connection is bad, then it'll be just lost in limbo.

listening to shadows from ASH, yes they aren't dead yet although most of my peers feel they are, i missed out catching them in Singapore, but you know money is always the case and going to a rock concert alone is as fun as playing table tennis solo.

Now my playlist has hit 'take the a train',

you'll find the quickest way to get to harlem . . . bad da bad do bad dodo (ella is the queen)

funny enough i was passing by Harlem, the Dutch one, probably where the name came from, didn't notice any swinging jazz bars though, just a hell load of bicycles and an Indonesian restaurant, that serves a kind of nasi padang gourmet style, it's funny how things always seem extra special just because you don't have it so often.

Like how safari's are in Africa.

Bad times are here to stay thanks to the world riding on debt, there isn't even enough money for wars to kick start the economy.

I dunno whether i'm lucky enough to go through such interesting times, or whether i'm shit scared that i'll be left in the gutter soon enough.

all said and done, we will always have music to inspire us, if there's no player in sight, at least it will always stay in my heart, even if i'm deaf, the vibrations are enough to know that i'm alive and nothing can touch me when things are already down in the dumps

people have been suffering since the dawn of time, maybe it's a big wake up call to everyone who has been ignoring the rate of poverty, that if we take care, or just plain care for one another then the world could just fizzle out in a more normal, respectable way

apart form it's accelerated, consumerist, suicide course it's taking on now.

dry air

2008-09-21T15:31:00.002+08:00

it's that time of the year,

the flu comes in coz the air is thin.

yet it's also perfect for airing ham and duck.

for every crappy thing there has to be a bright shining light.

hopefully before the end of the tunnel.

maybe you can line up multiple shinny still photos that animate as you walk through that dark tunnel, kind of what they used to do on the LRT's.

But somebody had to take em down, coz nobody wanted to continue paying for them, and we are left with a less aesthetic ride on the train...in our lives.

silverado

2008-08-18T00:30:00.002+08:00

lee chong wei makes new strides into msian badminton by getting a silver in the singles of the olympics.

but everybody will remember how he missed out on the gold.

the problem with competition is, if you aint first, you're last.

be it business, sport or war.

Nobody cares if chelsea could have won the title last season, the whole point is that they didnt.....and that's why they know if they dont do it this season, then all the millions theyve been spending on will go to waste.

they finally figured it out, you need a championship manager, and they have it this time....so maybe they can figure things out.

Kicking out talent, not respecting them, and down to it all, not paying them what they deserve, always leaves you with second best.

If people start to realize that, then they'll be making strides in everything they do, be it business, sport or war.

but sometimes only a select type of people understand what true recognition is, and these guys are usually the champions in their field.

the rest, are just the first of the losers.

and i hope i dont ever become one of em.

101

2008-07-21T10:29:00.002+08:00

i'm getting old

i sleep more often watching movies, something i'd never thought would happen to me, especially when i use to wonder how my dad would just fall asleep at the most interesting parts of an action movie.

same shit is happening to me, maybe it's the overdose of CG or my ability to endure bad storytelling.

a lot of people would say, well you're not even 30, you're still young, and obviously it comes from those who are 40 and above, it's amazing how they wake up everyday, i guess i'll only understand when i get that ancient.

but the only real thing that bothers me about aging, is the inevitable end of it all.

i've seen people who have passed away gracefully and those who weren't prepared.

how will i be in the end? i never had a problem with the concept of death whether it comes now or later, but if i do reach some phenomenal expiry date and, when i'm lying with my last breath.

will i then finally be afraid, the fear a result of never acting on your desires, and ultimate regret.

i best prepare to live a life that i can be satisfied with before i leave this world.

only ones own expectations count.

number 100

2008-07-10T10:13:00.002+08:00

the barrier

or barriers

there seems to be too many these days

and still none of them seem to be overcome

the spider's web continues to grow as fast as we do sometimes

it's almost futile to keep trying to break through alone

we must get some help or be eaten up like the rest of the other flies.

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

hello again my friend

2008-05-31T21:32:00.002+08:00

it's been awhile since we met,

our lives might have gone in separate directions

but our faith remains the same.

some say i've changed drastically, true in some sense, but only in a more honest way.

if honesty is negative and evil, than i proclaim myself a villain.

nothing interests me anymore apart from things that are real.

the illusions, the dreams have matured.

sometimes it feels like hot dry dust, but that very dust is what we are made of and will be in the future.

the moment to seize is shrinking and it's invaluable.

it's time for a new generation and no longer do i feel the mover but more the motivator.

the only legacy left, is to leave others to lead and live out whatever little i have as loud as possible.

no regrets, no time wasted, no no's.

till the next time, you are the only one that knows who i really am, and only time will reveal who we all really are.

right or wrong.

this is real life

2008-05-03T18:59:00.002+08:00

hot oxygen, this is real

pins n needles, this real

salted tears, this is real

silent suffering, this is real

twinkle toes, this is real

fluffy dust, this is real

rugged disappointments, this is real

thumping bass drum, this is real

moth on the wall, this is real

breaking glass, this is real

ice cold death, this is real

indigo skies, this is real

chopping board, this is real

down on my knees, this is real

blackened sun, this is real

.......................................this is real

new haven

2008-04-05T14:47:00.002+08:00

saturday again,

and it's great not to be working.

it's great not to be shopping.

it's great just doing nothing at all.

when we were young, we used to be so eager to be on the outside of the house, to meet new friends and make new adventures.

but now when were older, we see loads of people everyday, and not all of them are interesting, the best things in life is to stay away and let silence take control.

even cleaning my whole house never felt so good, as long as there's nobody in sight nobody to bother about, just my TV on the food channels and my laptop to scribble my feelings before i forget that i actually once was a sane person.

even just the sound of my fans and my leaking pipes are enough company to keep me at peace.

because a day and half more, i continue to be enslaved.

cherish the moments.

it's about time

2008-04-02T00:14:00.002+08:00

the weekend of weekends had just passed me by

nothing spectacular yet nothing mundane was involved

i decided to help my friend in his tattoo business and get my very first tat

on my inner right arm, yes it hurts, no the pain doesnt numb out, and i could have probably slept through it because i was so freakin tired before i got started.

apart from working 5 days a week, i drove to seremban before the tat to help my friend's mom with some household stuff, weirdly enough i would be visiting n9 the very next day to cover the first leg of the malaysian rally championships.

not the most interesting of sports but the people involved are one of the nicest in the entire world, so i think they deserved the exposure.

so fast forward flashback to sunday in the wee hours of the morning , while semi-recovering from getting inked over 4 hours i headed with my ap to bahau, a small town in the district of jempol in the freakin hell of nowhere!

it's kinda like close from the border of n9 to pahang.

and it's trunk round from around before kuala pilah to the destination which was the hotel base camp, era hotel, which sounded like the swankiest thing in the middle of freakin nowhere!

so getting in the rally mood i decided to overtake anybody i could because the sun was coming up and we kinda wasted time at one of the highway stops to try and buy KFC but the it was too freakin early in the morning and all they had was sausages and all the other shit in the breakfast package.

so obviously we didnt have any of that shit.

fastforward flashback to the rally, we reached the hotel bang on time just before the last media van headed off, i thanked the heavens that i didnt get into any accidents trying to overtake the million lorries and trailers enroute to our checkpoint.

the rally overall, good as usual, we wrapped up at about 2 something but we had to wait another 2 hours for the prize giving ceremony, so we crashed into one of the PR personnels hotel rooms.

i took a bath and changed my tat dressing, and eventually knocked out due to the exhaustion.

we got the prize giving over and done with soon enough, and we were glad to continue rallying home.

but there was something in our way.

a very big thing

a freakin mountain/hill, i dont really know what to classify it apart from being the DEVILS pimple on this earth.

it was about 20km jammed up to the top of the beast and at alot of times traffic was on a standstill, not suprising since there was only one freakin lane for each side of the traffic. talk about zero transportation development, thanks a lot sammy, i wonder why nobody gives a rat ass about you anymore.

so in short it took us only 2 hours to leave from USJ to Bahau, but it took us 2hours just to get past the mountain, and hell, there wasnt even any accidents or construction work, it was like a freakin phenomenon after getting past the summit everything was free flowing.

I hate all you drivers who cant just speed it up!!! cant you see that everybody is jammed up behind you!!!!

you will burn in hell with your car!

fastfowardflashback

at least nobody died, although we wanted to see blood, so went on to head to the senawang exit of the north-south.

and while we were crossing the overhead bridge we could see the entire highway jammed up,

we flipped , we cried, we laughed, we were glad the opposition are slowly leveling things up.

we even almost ran out of fuel.

it was the worst of driving experiences it was the best of driving experiences.

i know i'll never forget it, but i figured i jot it down just in case i did.

FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK all the useless drivers and transportation planners out there.

for this moment

2008-02-24T15:21:00.002+08:00

i never thought i'd have a window just to myself, in the midday that is.

just waiting for things to get on, when ur so caught up with work all the time, it's difficult to appreciate time wasted.

coz its money, and sometimes more than that.

but i guess those who can afford to throw time away are rich in it, or just unwise.

i havent a clue which category i fall into, but for sure, i'm running out of things to do if i dont have my trusty playstation or good old music CDs (seeing that i hardly buy newer CDs like all other old farts)

excitement has to come at a much higher cost,

this beast cant be held down by the everday lifestyle of a modern day slave,

its time to get out and live it, and fall back down to deepest pits in order to get back up again and zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

i even bore myself to sleep blogging.

but i guess i'm just passing time.

i see trees that are green

2008-02-20T18:01:00.002+08:00

and a shitload of kap chais

all over the place, all over the time

and i think to myself, its still a wonderful world.

-try this system in KL and maybe just maybe things can get moving,

-no scrap that idea, we'll just end up with a hell of a lot more people dying not only by road accidents alone.

not always great when ur in foreign lands on work, i'd so like to grab a ak-47 and start blowing shit up, but i guess it's not doable.

food, some are good some aint that great, ppl are always nice in these regions, i think they went through enough shit to know that life is shorter by being an asshole.

SO all the assholes i know out there take note.

big ass notes are suprisingly still more fun than coins

-there is some freedom and there isnt

but the essentials are all you need in a place like ho chi minh, your own beer and football on the tele

kudos to communism that works like here, cuba and singapore.

if more people care about others, then it'll truly be

a wonderful world

do you remember the days

2008-02-04T20:48:00.000+08:00

do not bring us to the test but deliver us from evil

the words that was input to my mind even before i could understand it.

i alwyas thought what test? like the test in schools? i didnt like those so maybe jesus did have a point.

fastfoward 20 years, i can still remember it word for word, and i can't account the numerous times we have been put to the test, and you know it just didnt stop after SPM.

but after getting through deepest of shits, maybe they should change the line to :

bring on the freakin tests and fuck evil in the face.

coz there is so much to learn and the best moments come in the most trying of those.

(yeah yeah i know its all about the apocolypse)

but maybe it's just some sort of stay safe method that saves people from more depression.

whatever it is, i know a played a game of football without boots,

my foot is hurt, but my heart keeps beating.

if there never was another hole to fall in,

i'd rather die now than worry about living.

runs-ing out of time

2008-01-27T10:50:00.000+08:00

Everytime i hear a tune from the 80s, however cheesy or corny it is, i just totally get into it,

i'm more into it then i ever was when i was a kid, in fact i was probably more into pop ular music back then.

but nowadays you can play any crap from what Michael Mann would use in a movie, with all that pornstar saxaphone, and i'm lifted into a higher state of euphoria.

it all boils down to nostalgia i guess, it's the fear of getting older or maybe the pressures of knowing that it's prime time now, no suckin on your mamas tit anymore.

i do feel old, i get tired faster, more emotional, cranky and cheap. And people always tell me that i'm young, obviously those who are older than me and are even more afraid of being labeled ancient, but you know you guys are,

because there are a whole other bunch of psychotic teens coming out from the computer age who are more violent and sex driven as ever,

they don't even know the meaning of politics just the controversies and they'll do anything to prove that their different, if it means listening to crappy music and loving crappy movies and dressing like chimps.

but weren't we any different when we were young?

all i know is, i've been shitting water for the last 3 days, the doc says it's a gut infection and that usually only tourist get it.

so i know my time is running out, the only thing i was ever known for my whole life was to digest any form of solid in my stomach be it titanium.

now im just an old geezer losing all the good bacteria in my intestines.

but thanks to the doc, i've got semi-solid turds thus far thanks to some medication.

so there's still hope.

time to chug some vitagen.

cant seem to remember

2008-01-21T23:32:00.000+08:00

there always seems to be many interesting things to write about,

but if you don't get it down fast enough, it just gets swept away in the short term memory of your brain.

i could have swore i had a million things to write about, but i guess it wasn't that interesting after all for me to even remember.

one thing i do remember is going to KLCC,

it's been awhile for me seeing that there are many other places to go to nowadays and i'm not desperate to see the latest pumps jimmy choo has to offer (yup i just noticed his shop)

but something really shook me as i stood on the second floor looking down and up at the big concourse and all the people moving up and down, well actually the building itself was moving

*pause

just remembered that tower records does not have their wall listening stations anymore, which makes me wonder, why the fuck not? it's not like their gonna get more people buying stuff after that.

*un pause, just had to write it down before i forgot.

and so the ground beneath me was actually shaking, like KLCC always does, it's still a magnificent structure that we take for granted and i guess it kinda speaks to you, the bigger and stronger you get, you still have to sway or else everything just shatters.

What the Fokk

2008-01-09T09:30:00.000+08:00

Bought a 9.99 flight back home from penang to subang.

it was about 50 bucks actually after tax, but that's as cheap as you can get, to SUBANG, i love the old airport, coz it makes fokkin sense.

And riding on a Fokker is not that bad, it's not too fokkin noisy, it's not to fokkin bumpy, there's a shitload more legroom compared to the fokkers at airasia.

the only thing is that it fokkin stinks of some fokker taking a fokkin dump.

but after a while your fokkin nose gets used to it.

It slower than your usual fokkin conventional planes, but i enjoyed the fokker.

i get to land in fokkin subang and that's fokkin excellent.

It's basically the start of a new fokkin adventure.

the good thing about

2008-01-07T11:12:00.000+08:00

writing a blog is that now I find that i can look back at my previous years and see what the hell i was doing or how i was thinking.

Looking back at January 06 and 07 i noticed there was a lot of football talk, which does wonders for my job now, i actually remember what happened a year ago,

and i havent been writing about football since it became my work, but i think i need to continue what ive started for the sake that deep down it is my most loyal thing in the whole world,
parents get divorced, cars and houses get better or worse, but a man's football club always remains the same,

unless of course you're a lesser of a man, or a frustrated scouser.

so its January of 2008, Manchester just beat Aston Villa 2-0 in the FA cup to progress to the next round, Liverpool drew with Luton 1-1, i'd love to laugh out loud but clearly Luton needed the money in the return leg and the scousers did not want to give up a percentage of their ticket sales.

*mental note, everytime this type of games happen, do put a lot of money on it coz you know exactly whats gonna happen, and it happens all the time even with MU sadly, was it Barnsley the last time?

back to the BPL, Manchester are lugging it out with Arsenal, but let me put my 2 cents worth and say that United are going to win the Champions League, nobody really has highlighted it that much, but to me they've really developed into a solid continental side, which occasionally lets some premiership teams beat them.

the BPL is going to be a tough one with Arsenal in full thrust and Chelsea are the outsiders but they have as much a chance as Manchester.

So my pick would be MU in the UCL and as fan for the BPL also.

and mark my freakin words, Mourinho will come to Old Trafford one day, it's practically Portugal already.

REVENGE is sweet.

white fur

2008-01-06T16:58:00.000+08:00

once hyperactive and over diuretic,

not to mention horny as hell,

now senile, sleepy but still diuretic.

time flies faster for those who walk on four,

and soon i shall witness their demise despite entering the world earlier.

but there's nothing more fulfilling than leading a loyal life, i wish sometimes people could be simple, but then again i don't find licking my own butt that much satisfying.

to sweat off the tongue is as marvelous as turning water into wine.

that heat

2008-01-03T18:24:00.000+08:00

small, curvy, bumpy roads,

they're not comfortable but they bring you places.

I've had to come from big highways to come back to these roads to remember...what Ramirez has taught me.

The hawkers, they never seem to die, they still back at their same corners, selling their same specialty, only filled with more white hair than ever, but they ain't dead yet.

And that hot hot humid heat, the breath of life that burns in my lungs still tastes drier than ever, it makes me love the darkness but also realise how cold it can be.

There is still not much vanity on the island compared to the city, people are simpler and could not give a rats ass what lies beyond the bridge.
Those of us who have left to find a bigger world, find an endless road that leads to the lives of others, though similar but far from comforting.

Let us not forget where we came from and those who choose to identify their origins, we are all part of something big but immensely diverse.

2008

2008-01-02T22:30:00.000+08:00

I can't remember the last time I worked on the new year,

in fact i might have never had before in my life, i would've remembered because i would have had triple pay.

so guess I'll remember this new year, starting the working day in an empty industrial area, hungover, waiting to slit my wrist.

but things have flied fast in the last 2007,

and so it goes when you're too busy to think, you don't have to worry so much.

A little hour of family and booze makes everything better, and that's probably all i got, but it might be the most cherished.

Nope, coz i passed out from all the food and the boring football matches.

Let's see what was most memorable about 2007 apart from Manchester winning the premiership.

.......nah it just flew past, and i didnt end up homeless.

so all the best, my the year of the rat make me appreciate the little crumbs often overlooked.

tis the season yet again

2007-12-23T19:08:00.000+08:00

christmas time,
year end blues,

never been so stressed,

but family's here and loved ones too,

making everything not so bad.

ive laughed, cried, shouted and suffered in silence, and i still feel in a bubble i cant break free.

so ive started something everybody's been pestering me to do,

since ive conformed to everything i hated in my youth, i might as well.

good night and good luck.

ive been robbed

2007-12-04T01:05:00.000+08:00

the 3rd of december, was one helluva day,

my news show didnt have any mistakes, i thought what a day,

then went to go eat steamboat at aman suria, the place i always heard about that was good,

made so many wrong turns, was too busy talking, got stuck in so much unnecessary jam, finally reached the place, it was not there anymore, its now an old time kopitiam or somthing like that, starbucksy type of places that sell you kopi-o.

fuckin hungry just decided to go Uptown for some lok,lok.

couldn't get parking near DU kopitiam, so parked nearer to vichuda side, crossing the back alleys, thinking how safe this country is compared to what it looks like.

had some lok,lok some monday bah kut teh also, which is really rare. then decided to get some DVDs from ss2.

parked again a street away, more jam cause it was pasar malam. before leaving the car, thought it was safe enough to leave the bags in the backseat, because hell there aint shit in em.

cross the back alley again thinking it looks dodgy but ive been doing it for years. didnt buy much dvds, walked through the pasar malam, didnt buy shit either. wanted to go murni for some supper,

it wasnt open.

when to wong kok char chan teng instead, man it looks really barney like now.

then finally decided to walk back, through the back alleys, safe as usual, then i noticed my car light was on,

i thought shit, fuckin left it on, when in the car, kept repeatedly closing the doors and boot before me and my colleagues realised that all our bags were missing, shit

mother fucka! they fuckin stole the shit, and nothing in the car was broken they only managed to jam the boot section and stole everything from there.

everything worthless, i had no money no shit, just my favourite crappy bag ive been using to travel around australia, thailand, cambodia, singapore, indonesia......it's now its own traveller, i hope it gets sold to some backpacker who ends up in europe, may my yellor rakpack travel places further than i'd imagine, and may we meet up someday at the sunny beaches in ipanema.

abd FUCK you little petty thieves that like stealing useless pieces of crap! have you ever heard of stealing from rich people!?

if you're happy and you know it

2007-12-02T01:58:00.000+08:00

this is what it all boils down to,

fri night, sitting alone at happy cafe,

having sliced fish in ginger onion sauce and carlsberg 100 something anniversary brew, big bottle all by myself.

listening to the beatles on the radio and watching my super ex-girlfriend on the tv.

my face, gets harder and harder each day, im starting to look like some war-torn drink seller.

IT aint easy, but i don;t give up that easily,

if it were too easy, i'd be bored anyway.

so cut the shit, tomorrow has just begun.

aight

Darul Relax

2007-11-18T10:02:00.000+08:00

It's a great change moving from one big city to another big city to a small city.

I just arrived in the wee hours to Alor Star thanks to airasia,

i Havent done squat yet but seeing how small and connected everything is, im already loving it.

and hell, theres astro and the internet is fast, what more can we want in the new world?

i might just retire in a place like this, selling some crap while im old.

but first, sleep, the most important thing to do in the countryside.

silhouette

2007-11-10T09:50:00.000+08:00

it's good to be back,

but as always, i still seem to be caught in this time warp where everything is stagnant.

Thank god for loved ones and food, the small things that keep you going, i must say even the cheap cinema tickets and piracy help to fill all uncertainty.

There's no place like home, there's no place like home,

weird how after i'm back, i still have another home to miss.

I was born to lead not read

2007-11-01T01:17:00.000+08:00

Respecta,

to all those ppl at home with families working their arses off so their children have a better tomorrow.

and to all those in charge with the power to change, they are always hated but it takes a special something to be on top

and the blatantly talented that can make or break without effort, just sheer instinct

and all those bathing in the fruits of their own labour, they deserve it despite the amount of ppl they screwed along the way,

because they can and they did, and those who cant are plainly just jealous.

for true humility and righteousness leads away from slander

a bitch is a bitch is a bitch

but arent we all, as in life

Back on my feet again, so insecure

2007-10-29T23:29:00.000+08:00

It's like a mountain on the horizon, or the tip of an iceberg.

It looks pretty simple enough to conquer,

then as you get closer it just seems to get bigger and bigger, as for the iceberg, there's even a whole lot that can't be seen.

but the journey has been set forth, and there's no turning back.

im gonna head up on this hill and come down a mountain.

coz that's just the way it is.

(none of the above is any of my original thought, only my mutual feeling, so it aint freakin plagarism that ive said it, im just too lazy to reference, so let it be - anonymous)

Non, je ne regrette rien

2007-10-21T18:21:00.000+08:00

There was a boy livin in a man,

With a dick in his hand, he kept trying to make his grand,

But sadly he was on the wrong side of the street.

Right when routine ruled his life,

He figured he needed some spice,

He indulged in full decadence.

When his mind flew faster than his soul,

he knew he needed to stop before he was old,

And that's when he started to realise,

he needed badly to deputize.

But planning was easier than doing,

he fell many times and became more gloomy,

he would need to embrace the harshness,

he would soon see the brightness.

So he walked the mile,

and it made him smile.

And the boy was finally laid to rest.

It ends tonight

2007-10-20T01:16:00.000+08:00

Even the toughest might not survive.

You just have to take your cue.

and take what you can get.

I'm just a hired hand, in no man's land.

Let me dream away on the silver screen.

coz, the waiting never stops.

everything counts.

Morchard Afternoon

2007-09-15T15:54:00.000+08:00

You finally get out, with more space above, there should be more room for manuevre.

The open spaces are left for the brave or the careless

Exactly.

It doesn't matter how old you are, this city is for the hard working.

Or the hard followers.

In the shadows and camofloauge

There's partying in the streets, but you are still watched closely.

Humiliation is secondary

Frustration is necessary.

To be different, is to be fragile, happiness is the opposite of progression.
(that was probably Freud/Marcuse, i try to avoid plagiarism)

Underground Mornin

2007-08-18T15:19:00.000+08:00

We always bitch about the price of fuel and how it controls our lives, since we have to drive cars in a lot of countries.

Public transport is cheap, it's good for the environment and it solves congestion.

That's why i take the bus to work everyday from my temporary home in Hougang.

Or maybe because i just dont have my car down here.
Stuck within the many lego blocks of HDBs.
But you taking the bus to the city would be too time consuming, so i'd get underground if i want to get to the city.
Underground when there is beautiful sunshine on the outside, the price to pay for speed.
Then you hit the heart of Singapore....
...and you wished you didnt get out of bed.

Like little ants in a huge colony.
You try to escape by getting back to the surface, but sometimes the sun stays away, and you keep on going.

My endearment

2007-08-08T01:15:00.000+08:00

Ever notice that when u start watching tv for more than 20 years, cable, a thousand channels is just never enough.

Nothing hits the right vibe at the right time, it's just filled with so many things that you just can't be bothered about.

And me and my fellow colleagues around the world crack our heads just to make sure every minute is an experience worthy of anyones 30 to a 60 minutes.

and as usual whenever i doubt it, it just pulls me back in.

there i go flipping between all the reality crap there is out there, to music videos and the history channel, and finally get back to the movies,

terms of endearment was on, jack nicholson steering his car with his foot, that brief scene was enough to hook me in to finish the whole show till 1.30 am in the morning, on a tuesday.

i've probably been to the movies more than i've been to church, two institutions so similar to each other.

you get in to listen to stories about other people, there's sex, drugs, music, drama, war, education and so on.

people get fanatical about both of it, and some are just happy to learn the simple lessons offered and overall there's usually a happy ending, apart from cult movies that are like cults in general.

and u can imagine before the cinema, church was probably the theater that everybody flocked to, it wasn't free either, u can't go to church and not offer anything during collections.

so like both institutions, im fanatical about neither, im not too bothered about the answers to whatever the director has kept from his audience, or the mystery's that god has left us with,

i just take to heart the message of the human condition that both of them lay out.

and i certainly agree to the fact that doing the right thing is usually the harder path,

but a path that leeds to freedom, freedom of fear, and a free man dies contented

and i hate living a totally contented life, but i'd certainly like to die one.

praise be to all the saints and the directors

may we understand the positive messages that have been constructed and have the wisdom to discard the misinformation that lies with interpretation.

this is my prayer

amen and it's a wrap!

Ok Comuter 2

2007-07-26T22:42:00.000+08:00

Back to cross the road to the bus-stop, in a distance i can see the 159, my lucky day

as the bus gets closer it turns to the 109, the mind has tricked again, we want to see only what we want to see.

when my bus finally arrives, i wait to get on after the disable-dude does, i see him all the time and also the same girl that wears black slacks to work, i bet she works at starbucks or something.

i stand again waiting for all the bastards students to get off.....nope thats another story

this time it rained like shit, so i tried to call a cab, no hope in hell

whats the point of having so many cabs, but if it rains there isnt enough, dats why ppl need cars! we're in the equator, it rains all the freakin time! how come singaporeans never figured this out?

the only good thing about not getting a cab is, the bus is pretty damn empty, its like a horror movie.

but the trip is short enough, and i reach my destination only to notice that it still is freakin raining like hell.

so i had to figure how to cross the road without getting to an aircond office all wet n shit. i obviously didnt bring any umbrellas or raincoats.

option 1 : i could get into the shade of the bus stop, hail a cab, pay $2.50 just to make a single u-turn

option 2: run like a monkey in heat

option 3: i couldnt think fast enough, so i waved goodbye to my colleague who did bring an umbrella, and left my stop without getting of the bus.

like rosa parks, i sat my ass down, because im not gonna get wet just for getting to work in time!

hell no!

so i traveled where the 159 took me, untill things would clear up and then I'd hail a cab and pay more than i would if i took one earlier at my office stop, but at least the flag fall of 2.50 wouldnt have been a waste.

i crossed highways and byways before the rain finally cleared up, in the heart of Toa Payoh.

all that were left on the bus, where a bunch of old geezers, i was hoping to get off somewhere near a mall or something, maybe i couldve made my trip useful.

so i took my cue from the geriatrics, and got off when most of them got off.

It was weird, almost like in the twilight zone, all this old people coming from everywhere, not just the bus i got off from, but from every nook and cranny all heading towards one building,

i just had to see what was going on, as i got closer, the sign read

"chinese medicinal association" or something like that, my memory sux.

i just stop in my tracks, and told myself to get the hell back to work,

but then i thought, why the hell did i come all this way for? i at least needed to get some tea,
so i head to a coffee shop, and sat myself with the rest of the old geezers that had nothing better to do in life but DIE!

i had my 1.20 teh ping, damn isnt it expensive over here? im never gonna bitch about KL again.

i wondered about life, i was listening to Tiesto on my mp3player, and nothing seemed to fit at all,

so it just meant: get the hell back to work.

I get my ass movin, i hail a cab, i arrive back at work, i pay like $7.00 something something

and realised i should have just paid the flagfall of 2.50 to make a u-turn

or i should have taken a cab from my apartment

BUT DAMN IT ! I COULDNT CALL FOR ONE!

rebel allianced

2007-07-24T23:52:00.000+08:00

its midnight, i have work tomorrow

im so not in the mood to blog.......i just have to blog

why must this be?

its like i so dont want to smoke ever, i just need a cigarette

drinking is bad for my liver, but i really need some liqour

im not saving enough, i just have to buy extravagantly

i so want to love, i just have to hate

im like a teenage vampire, so hungry and rebellious, im sticking it to myself

i go against every truthful thought i can think of

is this some mild form of schizophrenia, or does everyone live in two minds.

so tricky i reverse things just to go forward

i feel so lazy i just have to run

its not my responsibility i just take the rap

my heart aches, i just keep occupied

im tired like shit, i can laugh for hours

..................when u try ur best but you dont succeed
when u get what u want
but not what u need
...........i really gotta fix myself, or so ive keep tellin myself for the last 8 years

back in the saddle

2007-07-17T21:05:00.000+08:00

Back on the plate,

seemed like yesterday, as comfortable as it gets

will i start choking like owen, or will i Van and deliver.

it doesnt matter, it only means the ignorance is lost, in fact it was lost a long time ago.

Just nobody wants the dehydrating reality that makes some people put a bullet in their head.

we keep spiraling in the same pitfalls, always procrastinating the solution.

it's inevitable, it's only human.

it's me as it's you

we all just need somebody to lean on.........(church choir hums)

so just call on me brother, if u need a hand

dum dum da dum dum da dum dum

more than meets the eye

2007-06-30T21:03:00.000+08:00

so straight after work, i and me colleague caught a cab down to orchard

the place is crowded with the youth of the republic, all lookin cool and shit, but i doubt many could get their hands on any drugs

we await another party to hav some dinner, but walkin round the place so long smellin all the scrumptious aromas,

we decided fuck it lets eat, we cheap fellas so we head to the food court, we get a table for 6, he just leaves his bag on the chair and he says "lets go order"

and i says, "nevermind i'll watch the place"

and he says "dont worry my bags here"

and i says, "you just gonna leave it here?"

and he says, "its ok, its singapore"

and i whisper to him "dont ever do that in KL"

so i go look for some food, all packed as usual, seeing the density of the republic is like antz at a sugarbowl.

i go for something fast, not chicken rice coz ive been eatin it a million times, tried some sour spicy noodles, which looks very china the china.

not too bad, not enough, so i ended up with chicken rice anyway also.

the rest arrive, we finish our meals and we head on the screens.

we got delayed 15 minutes, according to the cinema they did not expect extra footage to be added, but we all knew those motherfuckers probably dont know how to read time.

we get in, its a digital projecter n shit, doesnt look sharper to me, but the colours look good,

suprisingly not too many adverts, GM probably bought up the space, it starts

its funny, it has a decent storyline, its super nostalgic, the effects are smooth, the babe is hot i enjoyed for the rest of the 143 minutes.

staring at bucks

2007-06-10T12:14:00.000+08:00

in the enclosure of coffee-chess tables, light folky tunes and industrial air conditioning

staring at the heat on the outside, too bright to register as a colour, cars hoping along like salmon at berth

i recall wathcing priceless recently, very classic storytelling, with classy acting, i love audrey tatou although my boss finds her face irritating,

he might have a point, but her acting makes me see past that, that makes me dig her even more.....

today is kinda golden like the cote d zur in the movies, or maybe its just my imagination, the last few days were more like jakarta at rush hour.

im off to suck some green tea powder blended with tap-water-ice-cubes

it never stops

if time permits

2007-06-07T11:42:00.000+08:00

soon i wouldve travelled all the stadiums of the land

some nice, some old, some dying

when will people start gathering together instead of sitting infront of a tv dreaming of the ideal

when will people start using their imagination rather than overstimuli of digital digestion

when will we walk instead of raping the earth to sit on our arses

when was before, now its over

i guess we gotta look on the little bright side of life dats left

*whistle*

ok comuter

2007-05-20T10:52:00.000+08:00

its back to school, i wake up on time everyday to catch the bus to work

i practically live in an air-cond environment, most of the time at work and back at the service apartment i live in.

so getting out of the house is like coming back from australia, the humidity gets to you, and it's only the bloody morning, when the suns not even at its prime.

i get the daily paper so i dun get bored waiting for the bus to come, one of those big spreads, 80 sing cents for so little articles, but it beats staring at the other horde of people wishing they hadnt woken up so early.

Then at a distance, this orangy-white block on wheels is waiting at the traffic lights just before my stop, im waiting for the 159 but i cant make out the three digits just yet, but im off my seat to get in line and i've finished the main page of the paper anyway.

I'm finally going to be free from this prison of waiting, but no, its the 109, how deceptive, my sentence is lengthened.

I eventually catch the 159 and cram in like a sardine in a can, waiting for a seat, but not desperate for one, since the leg room were designed for midgets anyway, i'm happy standing holding a cold steel pole looking at the bell af it were a button to send some nuclear missile into space, just feeling trigger happy, but there's probably 45 minutes left to go even though its only like a 10 min car ride.

then on the 20th min of the ride, the bus goes empty because it stops at the univeristy, i have a buffet spread of seats to choose from and i happily sit my ass on two seats, spreading my legs staring outside the window, giving the evil eye to all those freakin students, wishing they OD'd on something.

by this time im done with the paper, and i couldnt be bothered to read the classifieds which turns out to be the biggest section. so i decide to dream about my car, my shitty little car back home.

we've been seing each other for more then five years, we've done so much together, been to millions of places, and yes we've had our share of spoils, countless trips to the mechanics and several bumps and dents and the occasional crash.

my car's getting older, faster then me, like a dog would, i wouldnt trade it for the world, but i'm probably gonna witness its destruction.

ding-dong
my stops here, i get to work

fast-forward to the weekends

if im lucky enough to be done in the city before its too late, i can still catch the last few trains home, its usually packed heading to the suburbs, so i continue my stand, offering my sacrifice to god so that children in poor countries have a better life.

i still have to take another bus back, but this time its late, n theres probably only 3 people who get on with me, the lights are dim, i sit right at the back, dead center, like a counterweight to the 2 ton vehicle.

i get to see all the flats lit up, n yes they still look the same, just like the mornings.

last nite i took the wrong/right bus because i didnt wanna walk 400m to the proper bus stop.

right = because it still stopped at my apartment

wrong= because it was the reverse loop, so i had to see everyone get on and off the bus for half and hour before i got home.

no mp3 player, no newspaper, i just played music and movies in my head........new radicals came to mind..........weird.....u got the music in you..............you know this world will pull through.....dont give up.........u got a reason to live........you only get what you give........

man he sounds like every other preacher out there.

how do they do it

2007-05-15T22:32:00.000+08:00

copywriters, journalist, authors

great words at their fingertips, does it come easily after thousands and thousands of phrases, cliches, over and over again.

those who write probably have to drown themselves in lots of alcohol or drugs just to find a synonym that works.

whats worse is when you type a piece of crap that other people actually think is witty or funny, but you know u probably copied it from some cheap ass ad in a country u visited some time ago.

how many terminologies can u use up before u actually go terminal?

paraphrase like daylight robbery,

or just block and paste with technology.

when ya were young you thought ya were so damn creative an original

then ya grew up and noticed every original thought u had, was replicated a million times and was probably written by the greeks.

ya wish ya never cared, ya wish ya never needed to depend on that skill.

but ya know in the back of ur mind, ya'd better get whatever small piece of freedom ya can scrap in this freakin closed minded, authoritarian world that we live in.

so yabadabadadoodideedee, better to jargon than to sell out on your desires.

The golden city

2007-05-06T20:49:00.000+08:00

Not often do u see a golden display from the heavens complementing the protruding skyscrapers.

Magic hour, puffy clouds, it's turning orange to red.

An unknown feeling being completely alone, surrounded by many.

Too be silent amongst a frenzy.

Nowhere to hide, to run freely.

Only in the mind u can travel away, to a place, a time that fills you.

If hurt will not change you, if pain is not without you.

You carry on, you morph into what matters, and everyone finds their own center.

Remember the sounds, the warmth, the joy. Thou shall carry with you everywhere.

We will not surrender!

2007-04-25T18:21:00.000+08:00

dida might have tried his best to keep us out of the game

even evra helped screw things along the way

kaka's the shit like his name describes

but rooney has on his devil eyes

if u have absolutely no defenders left

when mikael silvestre is still wanting a chance

heinze can still kick some butt

we'll survive no matter what

come on maldini, come on gattuso

come back stronger and more willing

let scholesy make you drowsy

and giggs leave you with twisted blood

and if that aint enough, ronnie will surely leave you like a dummy

FOR 90 MINUTES WE'LL LET THEM KNOW...........
............WE'RE MAN UNITED HERE WE GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Pounding Prata

2007-04-24T15:56:00.000+08:00

Did the morning shift today, so I'm back in the afternoon,

decided to test my culinary skills by cooking whatever thats going bad in the fridge.

i wont go into details, but i wanted cook some frozen prata i bought recently.

whatever the brand was, the packaging sucked, all the prata stuck together, i had to kinda wait for it to slowly defrost,

getting impatient, i just started to chip away at the sides, getting more frustrated i started stabbing and cutting with a knife,

i lost the plot and smacked whatever remained on a hot pan, pushing it down with my fingers,

it aint doin shit, apart from burning the outer layers, i grab the knife and keep poking at it, flipping it around, pressing it down even more,

i get the chunk outta of the pan, i cut it up (its easier now) to quarters, and rip out whatever that's burnt.

i slapped the quarters back on the pan, and i keep pushing.

i end up with quite an interesting, crispy texture, but i had to peel out alot of the burnt stuff.

but i ended up cooking way to much, and stuffed myself silly, and now im goin thru a flour overdose, and i cant even think straight trying to research on malaysian sports, and im in an aircond room, and all the blood is flowing to my stomach, and i wanna puke,

but hey, lets not make things better by taking some coke

yeah, expand, expand,

......saw first jam in the suburbs, went for first morning shift, took the bus home with a bunch of school kids, watched the cleaners do their work, ER 1st season, CSI new york, coach carter, thaksin wanna buy man city, need to get editing, need more groceries, cant keep cooking shit, wanna watch wild hogs and all other shows, missed out in buying rusian dolls, to shy to do payperview, yabadabadoo.

ive got something to take away the pain

2007-03-26T10:26:00.000+08:00

another sunday

another futsal game at the usual 2pm segambut arena, when the sun is at its peak

the zink housing acts like a conventional oven, the spoilt exhaust fans are for decorative purposes and the pace of the game makes us wonder how a world cup in africa is gonna be like.

its usually a group of advertisers and church community friends that meet up and reminiscent our youthful days gone by. trying to be our footballing heroes, trying to be a legend for just one day, or for others, just some good exercise.

as for me, thanks to my torn ACL i usually just end up as a goalie, and quite a half-baked one since i cant hardly react with my feet to low ball situations, i aint gonna jump in and dive to save any ballz, and every player knows my weakness. But nobody wants to play there anyway unless their shit tired, and i pay my share of RM12 everytime, so nobody complains.

the best part of being a goalie is you dont have to run so much, just a lot of standing and reacting, and you hardly have to bother about hard tackles, just hard shots, and man, some of these old fellas can shoot, age doesnt seem to reduce the power of their follow throughs.

In short, risks of injuries are lower...............or so i thought.

I get tons of head decapitating shots all the time, but there was this softer curled shot to my lower left, i seemed to have jammed my index finger onto it.

Like an evian bottle being crushed for recycling, there went my finger, compressed and popped right back out.

If hands had brains, my lefty is a total retard, it gets injured all the time, it just doesnt know how to caress a ball like my right, like a virgin to a whorehouse it keeps ramming into those shots, i might as well use my cock to stop the balls.

at the end of the day im glad i still managed to stop the shot, preventing a goal, excusing myself from the game on a higher note as compared to the time i fractured my hand in school.

again i was in goal, playing with my marching band buddies in the free school quadrangle, using the gymnast ring poles as a goal post.
all of us playing on a slightly muddy heavily unlevel grass field in our whites and school shoes.

on came the slowest of backpasses, i steadied myself to launch it back in the air,

i slipped slightly, i missed the ball completely, there was a goal, and i came crashing on my hand

i heard that internal sound nobody else could hear : "crack" , and the rest was history.

now sitting back here, trying to type without my left-index, all those f*ing F's i have to type with my middle finger (how appropriate) i realised what damon wayon's was trying to do in Major Payne when he broke a soldiers finger to make him forget about the injuries he was having.

all these injuries, sickness, it brings you back a step, makes you think clearer of what you've done and how brittle we all are.

all that shit form the songs how scars remind us how the past is real

it really helps us to FEEL i guess.

ffffffffffffffin ffffffin fffffffin fffffffin Fs

the last dayz

2007-03-21T11:44:00.000+08:00

its been raining heavily for the last two nights, and im glad for having those cool-thunderstormed-sleeps

woke up several times today, apart from taking a piss or just opening my eyes, i just kept being locked down to the bed, some force of gravity keeping me there, did not feel too tired, so i just kept my eyes closed for the sake of it.

its a wonderful feeling having to struggle on how late you want to wake up, i waited for the sun but then it was still cold, so i decided to wait for the early afternoon warm to creep in before i decided to get my day going, which is probably gonna be filled with having meals banking a small cheque and watching tele

in this big-bad-city, the pace can really get to you, everything is money, you cant even have free entertainment, and in turn time is the money, so having all this time to waste kinda makes me feel like a freakin millionaire

the highlight of it all would probably be still stuck in the bed at some god-forsaken hour when your girlfriend has to get up to the grind of things and make it to work on time.
you hear the showers, the making up, yet you cant open ur eyes because the fluorescent lights might blind you seeing that the sun aint up yet.
and just after the scent of perfume is being sprayed, you get the gentlest goodbye kiss, a very unique and comforting kiss, seing that the person is willing to give a part of their busy schedule to show some affection to someone who is still laid flat on the bed, mouth as open as fly trap and probably with drool slipping through the side lips.
still to0 flat out to return the affection, you know silently that a new day begins.

and it ends pretty well too, when you're out lepaking at some mall just looking at human behaviour and decided to head back before rush hour, the traffic is as smooth as silk and the sun starts to tilt, and the colours come out gold and you know theres is still hope in this city, this country, as faded out as it seems most of the time, the sunset and swaying trees from the occasional breeze reminds us of a golden past and hopefully a future.

myron recommends

2007-03-14T17:14:00.000+08:00

ive been watchin a lot of movies during my unemployment, and with a less stressed-out mind i can be more objective in what i watch,

so heres some must sees:-

1. tenacious D and the pick of destiny

one of the most important movies ever made, musical, funny, plain good old motherfuckin fun

2. the pursuit of happyness

the film dat made me get a job, the whole freakin show is about the struggle of unemployment. i mean if will smith can go through all dat shit and still come out punchin and crying, hell so can i.

3. 300

theres nothing better than seeing body parts being sliced up/stabbed or ripped to pieces, all the blood, all the stylistic treatment, all the scottish accents

4. factory girl

if u never fancied sienna miller, you;ll love her here, playing Edie Sedgwick some famous icon in the 60s and Andy Warhols closest muse. Good hippie fun with all the sex and drugs and freedom. Guy Pearce was pretty cool doing warhol too, but who wouldnt be?

5. Pan's labyrinth

to be honest i havent seen it yet, but hell everybody seems to want to watch it! and i've purchased the damn dvd.

6. Liverpool vs. Man United 06/07

the most important tale of destiny. where a winning team can play absolute rubbish football and still come out on tops because fate dictates so. see how an irish player who doesnt know whether he's a fullback, holding midfielder or a cantona, score a goal at the end of the rainbow. and the most important moral of all, if you're a scouser, you're doomed to disappointment if you aint lived in the 70s.

Nana nat, nana nat.

2007-03-07T16:25:00.000+08:00

ive done it, got a job finally, my life isnt doomed after all!

im gonna be an assitant producer for a sports tv company setting up shop in Malaysia.

alot has happened since my last post, but its probably full of anxiety and depression.

so stay posted for more positive news!

Another dark stormy evening

2007-01-21T19:13:00.000+08:00

its about the only time i feel like blogging, when the weather is dark and mysterious...

but it was no mystery to me that Liverpool couldve beaten chelsea, i even picked out the scorer, mr. kuyt himself.

ive never been so proud of liverpool, the enemy of my enemy, who is still my enemy nevertheless

tonite, MU vs Arsenal, it'll be tight as hell, on a realistic level, they are equally strengthed, so the logical outcome would be a draw........but being a MU fan, im pretty sure the gunners are gonna be humiliated at home, and rooney will finally break his goal drought.

i hope i have a good year as MU is having, 2007 to be a blast, has to be, or my mid-twenties is really gonna suck

Its a dark and stormy evening

2007-01-13T17:37:00.000+08:00

I'm at the office, on a sat evening, checking out my edits or my editors edits, seeing that im not so proacative in editing nowadays, just learning to depend on other people to get the job done.

didnt bring my laptop to work, so im on the only office computer that aint a non-linear editing system, surfing the net, waiting for my editor to come back from McDonalds, he's buying me a coke, just what i need to get thru the day.

this is apparently my first post of 2007 after a few weeks exiled in the hours of reality TV production. it might just be my last post in the company Homegrown and with Mike, my employer for the last 3 years.

ive paid my dues in reality TV and finally now i have the ballz and loss of patience to look elsewhere. I want to get in a news network like Al-Jazeera or a sports network like ESPN and really give my all. i really need to find a way in.

i'll sweep the floors if i have to, my instinct tells me so, and thats the one thing ive been denying for a long time, and it always bites me in the arse.

but like all things you love, it always hurts to let go, i dont have children so i wouldnt know what that feels like, but leaving a company i like working in as compared to normal people who leave when they hate their jobs, leaves a painful scar.

i dunno when i'll get over it, in fact i havent even left yet, but my life is about big decisions, and everything i do revolves around decision making.

I've made up my mind, im not turning back, im forced to believe in myself.

phew

2006-12-02T21:35:00.000+08:00

yeah, i've got a day of a week!

a day! not even the weekend! just the sabbath!

thats how things are going rite now, just work like crazy and enjoy the smaller pleasure in life

like lying on my torn up couch, using my laptop wireless, wathcing house on tele even though arsenal vs tottenham is on, who cares really?

just interviewed siti for the first time at work, just one question, she had all the answers printed, i couldnt even hear her speak coz i wasnt monitoring with headphones, but i just said , "good, thats great!" i guess i'll only find out when i edit.

MU loans henrik larsson, betweeen him and ole there is now 70 years worth of experience.

my girlfriend is with her girlfriend in johor, miss her dearly even though we see each other all the time, but i guess when you're free and alone, life's a bore. plus when she gets back, we both will be all busy again. but i guess there will always be some time in the future

when i loose it and shout off in the office "who's comin with me!"

life is weird, there is so little free time, i had to shoot at 7am, i woke at 5.30 am, too early just incase i couldnt wake up, still had time

had enough time to cook myself some breakfast!

ooh, house is getting interesting

out

End of 06

2006-11-29T01:09:00.000+08:00

its gonna be december soon

another year gone by like the wind and thankfully the haze

there was the world cup, one in a million which wasted most of my year, and now im close to being flat broke coz i cant seem to figure out how to save

will next year be better?

if MU wins back the league and maybe the champions league, it'd be splendid

if i get a pay increment and a nice bonus

if my parents get more comfortable financially

if i get it together on the work, health, home front

compare myself to back in the dayz, i feel im a much improved product, but it just aint cutting it in the adult world.

next year will be interesting, intead of fighting all the time for what i need/want

i'd really have to guide others to meet their goals, and i cant possibly do that if im a wreck

so i guess i have no choice, every year goes by and more and more people depend on me

i dont have a choice, but im not regretting either

too many other ppl with shittier problems

its a time for trust, its a time for understanding, its maturing time

The Face of Cambodia 4

2006-11-22T20:40:00.000+08:00

told u they had worse ways of packing things up.....and actually there are worse! didnt take a picture

these are the famous landmines they've been talkin about, u might not loose ur legs, but more of ur sense of smell

these are the mine sweepers, yes they start off really young

if they dont succeed as mine sweepers, they can always go into the culinary arts and serve up the various forms of khmer food. this particular chap had the best noodle soup fish ball thingy ive tasted in the whole country

this is practically how the whole country looks like, i hope to be back in the future where i can catch a train and go to some high tech disco

the end

The Face of Cambodia 3

2006-11-15T16:21:00.000+08:00

this is the view from the guesthouse, somewhere along there are clinics where children are sleeping on wooden beds hooked up to IV's, if u enlarge the pic u might see something.

tis is the school that the malaysians are building, soon it will have 4 classrooms! thats why they need a couple hundred more to cater for the rest of the nation

tis the children that live in the surrounding neighbourhood, thats the average size for their houses, although there are smaller ones nearer to the rivers in siem reap

tis is our cameraman jeremy trying to get his national geographic portfolio of poor people

the two in the middle are building the school, the extreme right is the headmaster who is about my age and the rest are students forced to wear their uniform during the holidays because they might end up on tv....might.

The Face Cambodia 2

2006-11-08T16:35:00.000+08:00

this is one of the two main highways, of the whole country. good old fashioned two laned, and u can stack as may ppl as u can on any vehicle, be it 5 to a motorcycle or like this one here, and this one aint even the worse example

there are one or two rest stops when u near a small town, and thats not often. they sell all sorts of goodies like this deep fried spider and small frogs which u tend to kill on the highway at night anyway. for those insect eating lovers, u know this some good shit

this is Snoul, i feel like i'm in the wild wild west, only humid. this a good place to stay if you want to feel like ur in some chinese period set

this the place when its more bustling. dun worry, they might look fierce but none of us were hurt. we only witness some couple fighting in the night in thai, the guy must have slept with someone else

and this is what we could eat at night, when we arrived. rice, tea, fish soup, deer meat (only bones were left) and some cheap giant durians.

The Face of Cambodia 1

2006-10-29T13:13:00.000+08:00

this is the face of cambodia, let me take u into the wonders of the land, lets start with the beer, it's Angkor, it's lite, it beats water

this is the imperial palace (i think), where the controlling forces have a nice view of the river and everything is clean and dandy, u even see alot of white ppl around, making u feel all the more safer.

this is their central park, where if you're a giant u can just look down and tell the time, again its quite beautifully landscaped, there is lush greens, sand blasted statues and of course......

......homeless locals who dont bother as much to run around or play frisbee, they rather get some shut eye since thinking about life is too painful.

and if the pain is overbearing, u can always get ur local stash of happy stuff on the street or restaurants that are inspired by amsterdam

The Van Diaries Day 4/5/6

2006-10-17T13:24:00.000+08:00

we get some breakfast nearby the guesthouse

soupy noodles again for me, as the rest had fried rice

pretty good overall

and of course i had to have my coffee

the group continued to discussed about life, politics and stuff while occasionally watching Shoalin soccer on the tele

dubbed in cambodian

and whenever they dub it, u can only hear the dialog, u cant hear the sound effects, music, whatever

but its still entertaining

so off to the famous angkor wat

this baby was huge, i wont waste time explaining how this thing looks like, u better read it off the net.

as we passed thru the first gate, it was nice and cloudy, so we decided to quickly get to the main area, but just as we touched the stone road it started to scorch, as in we needed to repent for something before we entered the sacred temple.

overall, its a damn peaceful and quite place, a fantastic place to reflect on life, the use of light in the architecture is the main star. every corridor, walkway was beautifully lit by the sun thanks to numerous windows.

tons of buddha heads and murals were stolen or destroyed, there is nothing much left except the intricate carvings on the wall.

all the stones are fine after years of aging, it reminds you how time flies yet great things live on.

to reach the top we had to climb some steep steps, pretty dangerous seeing that there aint even any paramedics on standby. we were told that there was an easier way up via railings, but we couldnt find it.

so only after we made the trip back down did we see a long line of old ppl on the right way up.

still alive, so it was a good experience.

after that we headed of to Angkor Thom, the one you see on tomb raider and shit, this was a much more interesting and older temple, seeing how the roots of these giant trees have become part of the structure, transforming it.

then rushed to another temple up the hill to get a full view of the place, again more steep, slipery terrain, but it was kinda worth it, if the skies were clear that is.

we wanted to get like a good sunset shot, but it was just too overcast, so we just watched the loads of japanese tourist taking photos and looking at the wrong direction of the sun, since there was a reflection that is.

the rest of the day and the next is kinda of a blur to me already, i dun really know which took place when.

i know i had a cambodian haircut for like 2USD, if ur local u can get it for RM2, my boss told me to be careful because AIDS was rampant, and u never know how clean these guys are with their razors.......but the barber i went to was a friend of our guide Mendy, and his shop is easily ten times more cleaner than the indian barber i usually end up in.

checked out the bangsar area of siam reap, pretty decent but was too tired to drink and party.

checked out the local markets, bought the usual stuff ppl usually buy in thailand.

the highlight of the journey would be the fishing village off siam reap, dunno what is called but it was next to the tallest hill ive seen in cambodia thus far.

the whole time we were working, surrounded by poverty, we didnt let it affect us, but now when we have nothing to shoot, the pain sets in.

houses just off the river by a foot, the size of my room with a whole family living in it.

women and children bathing themselves on the main road where a few water pumps lay.

cook, shit, play in the same areas.

hard faces, happy faces, this is not the best places to be living in the world.

as shitty as malaysia is, we worry on the trivial, these guys are just glad they arent starving,

we eat like pigs.

as we travelled back to phnom penh in the morning, another 7 hour bumpy ride staright to the airport.

i know someday i'll be back, and i hope things are better seeing that at one time cambodia was the model city of south east asia, a place where singapore came to learn how to build a city, but it all went up in smoke thanks to the continual disregard of the poor.

everybody deserves a basic standard of living,

we must not turn our back on those who need it the most.

The Van Diaries Day 3

2006-10-10T18:41:00.000+08:00

wake up, get a cold cold shower on tiles stained by the laterite, still quite clen though, just coloured

off to our real work, before that breakfast

some chinese-like noodle beef soup thingy with livers and such

the noodles were like pan mee only green, and it sweetened the soup

not too bad at all.......had more coffee of course

took a stroll around Snoul, shooting some cutaways. there was a street market that we never bothered even stepping into

lotsa motorbike taxis, small horse carts carying rocks and other construction material

a huge anchor beer billboard, and the locals pronounce it as "angkor" making it clear why it has a strong foothold in these parts

see a huge satelite dish, probably where all the cable is coming from,

and lotsa lotsa red dirt and mud, lots of it.

so after breakie we head to the village of ksem krao, luckily only 20 minutes from snoul, so our arses didnt have to hurt on the road.

as you'd expect,more flat land, animals, and wooden houses

we reached the school site, its almost 70% done structurally, a band of kids in uniform (the first ones ive seen) all hanging around to be on camera, seeing that it was still school holidays.

got a tour from the headmaster who looks like my age, there was about 4 classrooms which will be solar powered, and there will be internet via the motorman system

THE MOTORMAN SYSTEM
-cambodian kids start a search on an engine and save it onto a disk
-a man on a motorbike comes and collect these disks and brings it back to the towns with internet, preparing 10 different possible searches
-the man rides back to the village to update the schools computers
-pretty neat for emails and porn but not to good for MSN

they have toilets, a field for planting vegetables so they can have recess fresh from the farm.

and of course a modern day well pump. its a really nice looking thing, all new and clean, u can push the handle with ur smallest pinky and water from the nearby swamps will come pumping through

but the malaysian donors decided to drink the swamp water on camera to prove that it was clean....even to the shock of our local guide.......he must think malaysians are one crazy bunch

after the interviews we decided to head back to snoul interview the district education officer and work was virtually over, with another 3 days left.

so what else is there to do in cambodia?

the angkor wat of course! not a bad idea, i thought i wouldnt be able to see this architectural beauty, but since its only another 7 hours away and they wanted to leave like straight away, and our arses would hurt even more.............its better than rotting in snoul.

so back in the van with our trustee driver Han, dats his name, not coz i suddenly remembered, but because he msg me recently.

so han and his millenium falcon took us off to a snails pace towards Siam Reap.

road,road,road,road,flat land flat land flat land, animals animals

then they decided to take a shortcut! im never happy to haer something like that, since we aint even on a decent road anyway.

so Han takes us into a gigantic estate, where u couldnt see anything now but rubber trees and an even lousier road, i mean single path where some busses even passed thru.

and we even get held up by dumb goats blocking the whole road, it took about another hour just to get out, and u can see from the drivers face that he wondered whether it was actually worthwhile, coz there were several forks in the road and i guess he just guessed most of the way.

road road road nite time, frightening road road road then small but rapid vibrations!

some weird mini humps.......dat could only mean one thing

CIVI-fuckin-LIZATION!

we had arrived, we put up at a neat guest house, we looked for food, we ate, we slept like how we slept on most of the journey there, except without any vibrations!

The Van Diaries Day 2

2006-10-04T10:58:00.000+08:00

get up to the sound of my monotone alarmclock-handphone

head to the breakfast area, i think it was 5USD for some crummy eggs and toast, but the coffee was satisfying,

the view was elevated, and this was probably the high-life for people around here.

WE head off to see the city, on our trusty toyota van

went to a couple of markets, squatter areas, riverside, all for the same purpose

to shoot all the poor naked children selling just about anything from birds to drinks

the most enterprising were the kids near the riverside

they would sell birds to be freed, and some flowers and fruits

they even jumped into the dirty river,

actually they somersaulted

they would carry each other and keep jumping in and coming out and jumping in

so we could get our shots, but i guess they were obviously showing for tips

mike gave them something for their efforts, like a couple of bucks

and 1USD goes a long way over here,

maybe the world should follow their model

a buck for all ur needs, food,clothes,entertainment

so after seeing the capital, we start our 7 hour journey to a town call Snoul

our base to head out to the schools in the outskirts.

the roads are single-laned, dusty, packed, kinda like Malaysia in the 80s

not roads, my mistake, their highway

and they have 2 major ones flanking the Tonle Sap, and i'd be travellin both at the end of the experience.

back to the journey,
it kinda starts when we pass the 1st bridge outta Phnom Penh, dunno what its called

straight away u see hordes of cars,vans,motorcycles,bicycles on both lanes

the vans take the cake stacking ppl up the roof, sometimes even motorcycles

hell even the motors could squeezr about 4-5 ppl, all sitting sideways like the Vietnamese

many restaurants on the road, even stalls selling tons of french loafs, really good stuff

with all the good food,we decided to stop where they sold spiders,frogs among other stuff

and me of course devouring a huge spider and half a mini-frog......once you've had an insect the rest are pretty much the same

the frog wasnt too bad, only later on i would realise where they'd collect them from....

after that we kept driving and driving and driving and driving and driving and driving

the whole place is flat, the tallest thing were sea coconut trees

kampung houses all around, paddy fields, buffalos actually resting int the water hiding under giant lotus leaves.

cows,cows,cows, lotsa dogs, naked kids, poor kids, everybody is filled with the dirt of the road

every driver has a surgical mask on

and they happily sell corn amongst other stuff hanging of the racks exposed to the laterite

just slap on some hot butter and it pretty much solves everything, I should know.

so we keep driving and driving and driving......and damn thats only like the first 2 hours

cant sleep, the road is too bumpy, make KL roads feel like a formula 1 track

we drive till the sun goes down, and u cant really see it happening coz of thick overcasts all around

its night, there are no street lights, you just hope that the driver doesnt kill us all, as everyone drives in the middle of the road until uncoming traffic beckons

and WE dont get any more comfortable as our guide Mendy informs us that road accidents has just overtook AIDS as the number one killa in cambodia

i shut my eyes and ask god to forgive all my sins

so after seven hours we finally arrive to this dark town, and we get set up in the best place around

Lyna's guesthouse, equipped with a 14 inch tele, cable, air-con, cold cold cold showers, and a decent bed

everyone else seems to be living in some wooden house that is red from the surrounding mud and dust.

we grab a late bite, good sour fish soups, interesting deer bones (the meat had finsihed) veggies and durian (really tasty ones)

back at the room i doze off watching assault on precint 13th on HBO as i decide not to off the TV to ward of all the surrounding insects.

The Van Diaries Day 1

2006-10-02T12:30:00.000+08:00

the airasia flight was delayed again

...typical

couldnt see much from the plane on approach to Phnom Penh, very overcast skies, dunno whether it was rain clouds or just plain haze

by the time we cleared customs, it was already dark with a slight drizzle

and yes we had met our subjects earlier at the LCCT

Ezer and his assistant, forgot his name

they run internet portals ranging from travel to dating (supposedly doing very well)
so this guys decided to build a school in the outskirts of Cambodia for 20k US out of their own pockets

and so me, my boss mike and colleague jeremy decided to shoot a doco for them for free

but mike had some other intentions also...

back to the Phnom Penh airport, we met up with our guides Mendy and the driver Tan or something like that

at first i thought they were just the cabbies, but being driven in a Lexus 4wd, i figured they were the hired hands.

off to our hotel, the royal golden something something, facing the river where all the tourist hand out

couldnt see much as things were pitch dark, but its kinda like driving thru bangkok, only with more older buildings and less dense. no jams at that hour.

only thing i remembered was that there were a shitload of clinics/hospitals/pharmacies

and huge signs like "DOnt take weapons!" as suppose to our Tak NAk campaigns.

reached the hotel, didnt look like there was anyone living in it, got into a lift built for 5 cambodians and could only fit 3 malaysians

room was pretty decent, cable had more channels than astro, and most importantly ESPN,

i didnt have to scarifice premiership action, but that was only for the night.

sprayed some anti-perspirant while waiting 4 the others to bath and shit

went out for some grub

all mostly small restaurant/pubs, all full of white ppl , kinda like Khao San

stop at a place, had Khmer food, kinda like vietnamese/thai.chinese

vegetables, chicken, soup, the usual fare.

it all looked quite bland, but once u taste it, its pretty darn good

had their local beer Angkor, tasted as lame as Leo beer

little did i know how the Wat connected with everything in cambodia

so continued to talk politics, business, trivia and shit with our new group

the usual stuff

went back to the hotel, saw the matchess, reading scored againts MU, i fell asleep

21 Sept 2006

2006-09-21T22:57:00.000+08:00

a day befor the finals of one in a million

the show ive been workin on most, this year

whenever a long show ends, its like the whole year has ended.

but this time, there isnt any grand feelings about the final show

maybe because it has come one two many times

or maybe because my entire team are fed up trying to work with an inexperienced-egocentric-pitiful-HEAD,

i shant use the word leader, coz he's more of a coward than anything else,

ever prepared to blame everyone else for his short comings, except for himself.......of course.

but if i spend time writing about that aspect of the year gone by, it'll probably take another whole year to complete.

so i'll take things in a positive manner like I always do, and treat my last day working with him as the happiest day of my life, even happier than the other finals i've done!

yes nothing feels better than the taste of freedom from ur oppressors!

and on the subject of freedom, i remember talking to my lawyer-friend how we always have to fight for some small form of freedom,

there isnt any way around it really, without a fight , i guess there would be nothing to be learned or appreciated.

we are all born into this worlds as slaves, be it at the start to our parents

and later on to addictions like drugs, greed, lust etc.

(addiction comes from the word enslaved in latin, or something like that)

so i guess its everybody's duty to fight for their freedom, if they want it of course.

i never understood fighting before until now, i always wanted to be a lover, but in the end, u cant always sit in your comfort zones ignoring everything wrong that goes on around you.

its not like im all hyped out to travel to some war torn country to start some jihad and stuff,

im more concerned on the smaller scale, like fighting for your dignity, fighting for respect, fighting for your survival.

i didnt choose a business job, or some money making thing as my craft

i decided to do work that i'dlove, love meaning i wouldnt mind not getting paid much for it

but when u dont get paid much, and you still have to worry about bastards around you that dont know what they are doing......thats when we have to fight

and i love kicking ass for what is right, and just

coz in general, we malaysians are one motherfucking lazy lot

i know, coz i am one

but now im willing to FIGHT

Gong Li kills Miami Vice

2006-09-12T11:16:00.000+08:00

Isabella.......

....whos dumb idea was that to have some chinese gal called isabella, drug-dealer, but is freakin chinese!!!

i hope it wasnt michael mann's idea, coz he's one of my idols

-but i guess everybody lets u down once in awhile

why couldnt they just get some hot latino chick or something,

i mean gong li is still hot despite her wrinkles, but when she talks english, the only way you're gonna get a hard on is by closing your ears.

terrible.......so not sexy,romantic,decent dialog-acting, whatever....

u can understand what she says, but it's like collin farrel is having a love story with a piece of talking cardboard......and yes the love story is a big part of the show,

hence....that BITCH spoiled most of the movie!

terribly disappointed, maybe coz i was so looking foward to the show,

i still like every frame of the show without gong li talking though (yeah even those where she just shuts up and looks pretty)

michael mann still delivers a realistic point of view to undercover police work (dont mind the ferrari's and shit)

im talking more about the action, all the shooting and shit, damn cold and real.

i still love all the glam of miami, dunno whether i was brainashed when i was young watching the TV series, didnt unserstand much then, but i never forgot the opening montage, all that flamingos and percussion shit.

ah, i still love it till today, and i feel the movie gives you all that, just with a harsher edge

so gong li, i forgive you, coz you still hot

its still a must watch movie

Soares to my throat

2006-09-03T16:16:00.000+08:00

im currently down with the tonsillities

havent had it in awhile, but it's one of those infections i've been battling my whole life, especially when i was young

im just prone to tonsillities, execpt for the time i started smoking, i guess all the tar must have killed everything in the throat including all bacteria and virus.

it's a really sucky infection coz it hurts to eat, and i love eating, and having no appetite due to the pain of swallowing, really sucks, it sucks so bad i can't even suck anything without feeling all the lumps in my throat flare up.

the fever that comes along with it kindza sucks too, ive been sleeping for the last 3 days, non-stop, and i still feel sleepy, i even get the chills when the whether is like humid and hot like hell.

i take my medication and lozanges (which i never find the effectiveness in) and even try to battle it out with gargles of warm salt

my fever is getting better but my throat is still screwed up, soon i'll have to buy some honey and lime juice, apparently its good, and gonna start drinking some herbal tea, and whatever

coz im freakin irritated on my irritation!

and all i can really do now is write about it till it heals

damn you tonsils!!!!

Tears to my eyes

2006-08-25T14:13:00.000+08:00

You make me happy, when skies are grey!

"They've had patience with me and the Gaffer's always been good with me, just telling me to take my time and in the end it's paid off." -the great Nowegien

It certainly has.

3 years since I've seen Ole score a goal, and I'm damn glad i waited almost the whole match on a Thursday, 3 am morning to see it.

A true hero to all MU fans and an example of perseverence for all.

Thanks for all the memories Ole, thanks for sticking in there, thanks for making the whole trip as emotional as can be.

You are our Solksjaer, our only Solskjaer!

O....le, ole, ole, ole
Ole.......Ole......

Let the football do the talking

2006-08-21T00:10:00.000+08:00

The boys are back.

“It’s proved that people who have been saying things about us don’t know either of us,” Rooney told Sky Sports. “We let our football do the talking and I thought Cristiano was brilliant and he scored a great goal.”

i've been telling everyone, this was to be MU's year,

some say all fans would say that.

True, i'm a freakin fanatic, a red till i die, but dats wat gives me the knowledge and the observence that fergie has been slowly building his new fledgelings, and they hav always been on a progressive curve.

if u werent fanatical or objective, u wouldnt hav noticed it.

i always knew that rooney and ronaldo were friends, not just professionals, but true friends.

and even the best of friends hav their controversies, and its nothing like teddy and cole in the past. what ever happened to roo and ron at the world cup, is far behind them.

sure the boo-boys will taunt the portugese winger, but that will only be their own undoing as the boy-fired-up-can-kill.

so im glad they opened the season with a bang, sir alex knows the EPL is a league of zero tolerance, a game lost can decide everything.

we are ready, there is nothing more for me to say.......

let the football do the talking

1st week of EPL 06/07

MU 5 Fulham 1

and yes we scored all the goals, even fulham's.

Cinderelli

2006-08-18T12:33:00.000+08:00

House work

the bane of my existence.

Lets see when i was young i would hate cleaning up anything, but my dad being chinese and all saw it as some major sin between my brother and me, so he decided to exorcise the dirty demons and make us godly when it came to cleanly.

Sometimes as a kid u had to motivate urself to do all these shite, like i'd pretend to make roti canai whenever i had to fold all my clothes.

coz my dad would open the drawers sometimes and freak out, so i'd to do the whole motherload.

dats probably why i was so obsessed with the mamak, but who isnt eh? no kid wouldnt find the making of roti the most splendid sight and smell in the world. Plus i grew up in klang.

i'd usually think im in the millitary and shit thanks to shows like full metal jacket, tour of duty, platoon bla bla bla. washing plates, cleaning the floor, picking the dog shit all in hope that charlie would come crawling the back yard for me to KILL! demented yet fun for all young boys.

fast foward to college life,

total, unimaginable FREEDOM!

i didnt have to clean shit up, my sergeant major of a dad wasnt around to be nitpicking on every speck of dust that lay on the ground.

like a junkie i took to not cleaning anything up for days, even my own body!

I even lived with roomies that couldnt give a shit if they're loaf of bread in the cupboard degraded to a pile of moss, they'd rather buy a new loaf and keep it next to the rotten one.

There were more cigarette ash then dust on the floors, living with graphic designers, they would leave all sorts of cut up shit everywhere, and like seinfield, the doors were always open for more random assholes to keep walking in and out piling up the sands of their shoes to wherever.

that was the life.

Now working life,

all the teachings of the father finally make sense. u cant live in a place u dont take care of.
so the fact that i cant hire a maid or purchase one of those robot vacuumes. i guess i have to sacrifice some PS time to clean up.

after spending my fri afternoon cleaning up my room and living quarters, and the night before preparing dinner, i suddenly realise how it feels like to be a housewife.

i mean cooking for 4 ppl is like a mini task altogether, u have to balance the time of all sorts of dishes and get it all done by the time everyone gets home.

the painful part is completing the mission just on time, and everyone ends up coming and hour later and all the food gets cold u might just have heated up a can of spam or something.

and all the chores housewives have to do on a daily basis, alotta manual labor. I mean i've realised all these things before, but dont we often forget about it.

so to all housewives out there especially my mom, i hope i coz less trouble for you all in the future, you are the most unappreciated lot in the world even lawyers get more respect.

Happy Bday Meara

2006-08-03T17:38:00.000+08:00

lets see, i think she was born in '97, so she's nine, standard 3, yeah that makes sense.

going back to penang to see her and her friends have a pirate themed party thanks to johnny depp and co for inspiration.

i dun remember having any themed party, in fact bdays for me are either standard, nice, or plain crappy or weird.

the turning point was when i had a pizza for my bday instead of a cake, im guessing i was in either late primary or early secondary,

although i did like the concept i guess bdays become more of a weird thing for me.

and my 21st bday, i did absolutely nothing in australia coz everyone was having exams, and i hate to be the type to hint about their bday.

but i understand why ppl do it, i mean it should be a day to remember no?

or when u get older, its more like a death countdown.

and gifts..........just like xmas, is always a bloody pain in the butt especially when u hav to buy it for someone u know well enough that u've already bought all sorts of shit for.

for ppl u dun know so well, its easier, there are always PR gifts and shit,

and kids are great, i mean there is so much cheap shit out there that kids go gaga for!

thats why CNY is a celebration that makes sense, u give other ppl money, no headaches,straight to the point, if i like u i give u lotsa money, if i hate u, i still give u 4bucks minimum and if i dun know u, see ur lucklor.

seasons greetings to all

Tsk Tsk Tsk

2006-07-23T11:15:00.000+08:00

these guys are suffering from some post world cup syndrome, they so bored they decide to shove their boots and amongst other things to their fellow students.

yup if you havent heard about the UPM students harrasing their chinese peers, go to youtube and search for UPM students, or bullies, or I'd search for arseholes.

one of the best pieces of video journalism i've seen in malaysia for a long time, thick in the action, decent picture quality and a true depiction of the state of the nation.

be shocked, be angered, or like me, unfazed.
I've seen these mats my whole-life, give them a degree, a multinational company, nothing changes, if you are born shit in ur brains it hardly cleans up.

Top of my head

2006-07-21T11:45:00.000+08:00

WORK

-gonna have a live show tonight, gonna be mixing the visuals, pretty used to it, only the fact that the mixer tends to screw around assures me of some blunder tonite.
-morale is on an all time low on this project, totally could not be excited whether another contestant will capture the hearts of the malaysian ppl, bla bla bla, its all work for me, and I've been regretting not putting my foot down at the start of the year, i will remind myself to be stronger after this project, and NEVER do another idol-like show again, 3 years is an eternity.

HEALTH
-just recovered from food poisoning, at least i think i have since stuff down south is still murky.
-keep forgetting about my gout till my feet start to tingle with crystal pain.
-and even further back in my mind is my obesity, which thanks to the food poisoning, i got to knock off a few inches, or maybe half an inch.

MONEY
-bought more airasia stocks during the worldcup only to see it crash to an all time low, but am pretty confident they wont close shop
-i tend to not notice my bank balance whenever i hit the atms, knowing in the back of my mind that the numbers dont seem to be increasing even after i receive my paycheck
-dun think im spending much though

FAMILY
-dont see much of them nowadays, really starting to wonder whether i should do more as a son

MYGIRL
-Fuan got a new job at MZ motorrad some german motorcycle company, it's at glenmarrie, hopefully she stays at my place more often coz it only takes like 5 mins to get there
-we busy as usual, but are lucky to see each other a lot
-it's all good here

MYDOGS
-I hope they are still alive!

MY PlaySTATION
-is dead!!!!!!!!!! oh how i will mourn it till PS3 comes out

MYCAR
-i dunno, i've been driving my dads truck for so long, i hope AH BEN still loves me

a few more months till a new year comes, i can only hope that less ppl stop dying or getting killed and i should be so lucky to worry about the more trivial things the next year wil bring.

Come On England

2006-07-03T00:09:00.000+08:00

Aint he a happy bitch.

That's twice, against this bitch,

and even more times with other teams since the '70s

England are just hopeless in penalties, i personally think they shouldnt even bother training on it, just concentrate on winning, coz these blokes will never have the composure.

In brief:

-i think Rooney wanted to step on some Portugese balls
-i dun think he shouldve been sent off
-i dun think a country like Argentina or countries who use to kill each other in wars should be allowed to referee one another in the closing stages, Imagine an Israeli ref in a Palestine vs Iraq match.
-Hargreaves deserves his praises
-Lampard, Gerard, Becks, are all burnt out
-Crouch is still a freak
-Lennon is promising
-the Portugese are still hopeless

and at the end of the day, England will only win when some of the english FA bastards start dying.

....telling a manager his gonna be fired after the world cup regardless, BRAINLESS!

In Memorium

2006-06-28T17:23:00.000+08:00

Coming home to Sunway on the federal,
noticed the studio apartment project next to carefour,
not more than a few months ago i recall a story of a couple planning to invest in that place claiming it was pretty reasonable and well connected to public transport, the komuter that is.

the couple was my mom's friends, they have 3 sons of whom the eldest i've known from church back in penang.

all of them are pretty much grown up and the retiring couple had dreams of opening a small kopitiam, like OLD KOPITIAM CAFE where they could spend the rest of their lives making small cakes and drinks to make do of time.

the husband, once succesful and healthy had been cursed with liver cancer and the complications that came with it.

I was only an aquaintance, i've probably met him twice in my life,

but that time was long enough to see the bright shining light in him, however weak his body was.

so back to events last week.....i had to attend his funeral.

his family, however prepared they were with his sickness, his final breath must have echoed a pain that will linger on.

in the church he looked presentable as ever in the casket as the ceremony went thru the usual prayers.

a strong gush of wind, kinda signalling the separation of spirit.

off to semenyih, a pretty far off place to lay rest, but a beautifuly crafted by nirvana.

the rain that hammered the procession cleared up instantly as the casket reached the burial grounds as if the man himself opened a big umbrella in the sky for his family and friends.

more songs, prayers, flowers and candles

ashes to ashes, dust to dust

he finally lays to rest, may his family find peace.

Louis Loo

World Cup Picks

2006-06-03T23:18:00.000+08:00

Germany

The host nation, pretty young team, they will have home support, might be enough to take them all the way.

My Prediction: Maybe all the way, most big footballing nation do win it at home
Realistically: At least the semis

Brazil

Need i say more? Favourites and the best when it comes to the beautiful game.

My Prediction: I still dont like them winning so I hope they crash in the semis
Realistically: they can bag the cup as usual

England

my heart still lies with them, however over rated they always seem to be, but this year the squad is finally solid.

My prediction: THEY WIN!!!
Realistically: wont pass group stages, Peter Crouch! Come on!

Italy

i think they have a fantastic squad this competition, and they look more focus and will be serious in not turning into another embarrasing campaign

My Prediction: I hope they're plane crashes during take off in italy
Realistically: I think they can go all the way

Sweden

My favourite dark horse, pretty much the same team as euro, still depending on larsson and ljunberg is still half injured

My prediction: i hope they reach the semis
realistically: they can reach the semis

Argentina

a young hungry skillful team, they can beat anyone if they not wondering what they're lives will be after they win it.

My prediction: they gonna win this
realistically: they can

Holland/Portugal

same bunch of wankers they always are, skillful but wasteful

my prediction: crash out in the second round
realistically: they could go quarters

Ghana

My pick for the african continent, very solid defensive team, they're gonna be the shockers

my prediction: semis
realistically: cant pass group stages

France

Its over for the team and Zidane, some world class players that dont seem to click this time round

my prediction: crash in the quarters
realistically: semis

Spain

got a real good team this time, very midfield packed though, they will have to come up with the goals

my prediction: they could win it
realistically: quarters/semis

and the rest of the teams can suck my balls! but i think teams like Japan, Australia, Croatia, Mexico, Ukraine, Croatia will have my support since Malaysia will never amount to anything, and these teams might have some suprising results, in short they're good betting picks.

so according to my predictions, there are at least 4 teams that can win it. i should hit the mark